For those who haven't worked in bedside care - you might not get how difficult this is to ascertain. Say the wrong thing, piss off the patient (or even worse, the individual you just insulted is the one who will be filling out the survey), get the Press-Ganey survey back, your manager reads it and chews you out, it goes into your file. Asking something as benign as "Hello, who do we have visiting you today?" can set off a stupid firestorm of insanity....
which is why I find this entry so funny, and I can completely relate!
Perfect timing! This morning I went to a medical appointment with my ex-husband and was asked my relationship to him. I said, "I'm his former wife." Nursing assistant says, "To us, you're still his Significant Other." Um... if you say so....
I used to take my father to his cardiologist's appts. Mother never went with us. Some years passed and an occasion arose to give the doctor's nurse my phone number. I must have also mentioned that I was his daughter. The [very middle-aged] nurse immediately became relieved to find out who I was, since she had been thinking my father was a dirty old man for having a much younger wife. (P.S. My mother started accompanying us to these appointments after she found this out. Damn that nurse.)
'Er, hmm.' EMR leaves no option for 'discrete cough'. The non sequiter side-track, like, 'wasn't wearing my tri-focals this day, and did not note whether anyone was wearing matching wedding bands' could've been covered by 'elderly female visitor', or in the interest of Press-Ganey, perhaps 'visitor in green coat'.
Wife or adult daughter...Nurse Judgy McJudgerson at your service.
ReplyDeleteFor those who haven't worked in bedside care - you might not get how difficult this is to ascertain. Say the wrong thing, piss off the patient (or even worse, the individual you just insulted is the one who will be filling out the survey), get the Press-Ganey survey back, your manager reads it and chews you out, it goes into your file. Asking something as benign as "Hello, who do we have visiting you today?" can set off a stupid firestorm of insanity....
ReplyDeletewhich is why I find this entry so funny, and I can completely relate!
Whoever shows up that day
ReplyDelete...or possibly some combination of the above
ReplyDeleteBest way to establish 'What is your relationship to Mr X, and are you his legal next of kin?'
Anonymous @8:13: and here I thought I knew all the reasons to hate Press-Ganey. Thanks for a new one.
ReplyDeleteClone. Just say Clone.
ReplyDeleteIf it matters, ask. If it doesn't matter, "female visitor" covers nearly all the bases.
ReplyDeletecomputer charting - allowing daily opportunities to appear foolish.
ReplyDeleteFemale facilitator in the witness protection program, you will think back on it and you will never know exactly who she was or why she was there.
ReplyDeleteForget it, Jake. It's Chinatown.
ReplyDeleteSome female dood.
ReplyDeletePerfect timing! This morning I went to a medical appointment with my ex-husband and was asked my relationship to him. I said, "I'm his former wife." Nursing assistant says, "To us, you're still his Significant Other." Um... if you say so....
ReplyDeleteI used to take my father to his cardiologist's appts. Mother never went with us. Some years passed and an occasion arose to give the doctor's nurse my phone number. I must have also mentioned that I was his daughter. The [very middle-aged] nurse immediately became relieved to find out who I was, since she had been thinking my father was a dirty old man for having a much younger wife. (P.S. My mother started accompanying us to these appointments after she found this out. Damn that nurse.)
ReplyDeleteMy dad was in hospital one time, in attendance were his current SO, ex-wife, and four adult daughters(none of whom particularly resemble him).
ReplyDeleteEvery time there was occasion to mention us, it would be "your....family" or "Mr (Dad) and his ....family"
I'm now wondering if they all thought this very fat, self-deprecating, middle-aged man had somehow aquired a harem.
'Er, hmm.' EMR leaves no option for 'discrete cough'. The non sequiter side-track, like, 'wasn't wearing my tri-focals this day, and did not note whether anyone was wearing matching wedding bands' could've been covered by 'elderly female visitor', or in the interest of Press-Ganey, perhaps 'visitor in green coat'.
ReplyDeleteIf you ever want to bake, Dr Grumpy, do it artisan style... http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00629K4YK
ReplyDeleteThey forgot "b!tch".
ReplyDeleteI'm so sad. I just reached the "end" (actually beginning) of your blog. Now I don't know what to read.
ReplyDeleteDawn, that is exactly how I felt when I first started reading Dr Grumpy's blog.
Delete"The label was hard to read because it was behind the air valve."
ReplyDelete'Whatever' works for me.
ReplyDelete