Monday, September 22, 2014

On call, Sunday morning, 2:38 a.m.

Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page."

Mrs. Insomnia: "Hi, I'm a patient of Dr. Brain, I saw him once, about 5 years ago."

Dr. Grumpy: "What can I do for you?"

Mrs. Insomnia: "Well for the last year or two I've been a little forgetful. You know, losing my keys, or going into a room and forgetting why I went there."

Dr. Grumpy: "Okay..."

Mrs. Insomnia: "I had dinner with my daughter tonight, and she suggested that maybe somewhere in that time I might have had a stroke. I didn't think much of it, but now I'm really wondering, and thought I better call Dr. Brain to see if I should go to the emergency room."

Dr. Grumpy: "How long did you say this has been going on?"

Mrs. Insomnia: "At least one year, maybe two."

Dr. Grumpy: "I'd just call Dr. Brain on Monday."

(mumbled conversation in background)

Mrs. Insomnia: "My daughter thinks I should go to ER, and she should know, because she works for a dentist. Anyway, we're on our way there now."
at

16 comments:

  1. OMDGSeptember 22, 2014 at 5:49 AM

    That patient totally got admitted to my service yesterday for a rule out stroke workup.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2014 at 8:12 AM

    He already knew what he was going to do, and yet he needed to wake you at 2 AM anyway. As long as it is "free" patients will call all hours of the day, and continue to also waste healthcare resources such as this unnecessary ER visit.

    ReplyDelete
  3. BendySadnessSeptember 22, 2014 at 8:32 AM

    Well who would you trust, a neurologist or somebody who works for a dentist. Don't be silly Dr Grumpy. I mean, she works FOR a DENTIST!

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2014 at 11:26 AM

    Thanks for checking in with me first. You make a convincing case for gun control.

    ReplyDelete
  5. ndenunzSeptember 22, 2014 at 11:56 AM

    Anybody wanna bet an what the CAT scan showed?

    ReplyDelete
  6. The Patient DocSeptember 22, 2014 at 12:23 PM

    They always call even though they already know what they want to do. Whenever they call I usually say one of two things:
    1) come to my office tomorrow
    2) go to ER

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2014 at 12:44 PM

    I'd submit the daughter to a lot of painful tests. Just to rule out any further misbehaviour...

    ReplyDelete
  8. ShellyeSeptember 22, 2014 at 1:33 PM

    Who needs a doctor when your daughter works at a dentist's office?

    I must admit, that's a little better than seeking medical advice from a guy at a garage sale, but not much better.

    ReplyDelete
  9. RageDinoSeptember 22, 2014 at 2:45 PM

    So what exactly is the procedure if you go to the ER and say "I think I had a stroke 2 years ago"? Do they turn you away?

    ReplyDelete
  10. jadeSeptember 22, 2014 at 3:36 PM

    Well, I'd better give you a call right now and get ready to leave to ER: I'm always looking for my keys, phone, children, socks, other very important stuff and it's been going on for quite a while now - What was your phone number again?? Hurry up, it's really urgent!
    PS and thank you for cheering me up so often with your blog posts

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2014 at 8:10 PM

    "And he just told her not ten minutes ago to hang up the fucking phone and take me to the ER."

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2014 at 8:22 PM

    "My daughter also says that Sunday between 2:00 and 4:00 am is the best time in the ER to meet cute guys who smashed their cars up on the way home from the clubs."

    ReplyDelete
  13. MeganSeptember 22, 2014 at 9:40 PM

    Takes the cake for the most urgent (ahem) subacute stroke presentations.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Nurse LillySeptember 22, 2014 at 9:43 PM

    TPA! TPA! TPA!

    ReplyDelete
  15. HollySeptember 23, 2014 at 6:30 PM

    Because obviously what my daughter thinks is an emergency on our part is an emergency on your part.

    Really?? You've waited for 2 years and you can't wait 2 more days?

    SMH

    ReplyDelete
  16. cliffintokyoSeptember 26, 2014 at 10:33 AM

    Perhaps the patient should also get the cavities in her brain filled by a dentist?

    ReplyDelete

So wadda you think?