Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Life is a highway

Mr. Octane: "I need a note saying I had a doctor's appointment."

Dr. Grumpy: "Okay, for your job?"

Mr. Octane: "No, for the police."

Dr. Grumpy: "The police?"

Mr. Octane: "I got a speeding ticket on the way here."

Dr. Grumpy: "I don't write notes for that."

Mr. Octane: "If I hadn't been speeding I would have been late."

Dr. Grumpy: "You came in 15 minutes after your scheduled appointment time."

Mr. Octane: "Well, I would have been later."

9 comments:

  1. So, can you bill that as a separate consultation?

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  2. "I'm late for an appointment." I have never heard that excuse on a traffic stop.

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  3. My favorite was the patient going to court who wanted a letter saying their health condition would not allow them to serve time.

    The provider's response: "You committed the crime, you do the time."

    The judge agreed.

    But our providers get unusual requests all the time: one was a request for a little dog. Provider wrote the letter and patient got the dog.

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  4. "Oh, and can you also give me a signed certificate saying that someone died of natural causes? Just leave the name blank and I'll fill it in myself later."

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  5. Hmmmmm I agree with dr G and the gang here like 99% of the time. Did you sense the but coming? He's not asking for a lie or to make anything up - simply to verify the truth. Did he not have an appointment scheduled? Was he not pulled over on the way to the appointment? Unless I'm missing something he seems to only want evidence of the truth. Not sure it will help get him out of the ticket but what's the harm? Charge him for the letter and write the truth! Or was the stop on a different day? If so, that's not clear in the story.

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  6. Anon, wtf would you give the guy the idea he might be right in thinking that a doctor's note would get him out of a speeding ticket, or that a doctor should waste their time doing so, or do something so immoral as to accept money for doing such a thing?

    Also, since you don't seem to be clear on the issue: it's not right for the patient to ask the doctor for something like this. No one gets to break the law because they have a doctor's appointment. It's idiotic and offensive that the patient even asks, like it makes sense or is right on some level.

    In case that isn't clear: Don't do it. It's wrong.

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  7. I had a patient ask me to write him a note to keep in his glove box stating that he 'did not need to wear his seatbelt because he had previously had an abdominal surgery and the surgical site was painful from the shoulder strap'...the surgery was 10+ years earlier. Ummmm, NO!

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  8. "Also, I plan to submit the fine to my insurance company."

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  9. "Oh, and I told the highway patrolman that my husband was a doctor, so, if anyone asks, do you mind playing along?"

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So wadda you think?