Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Today's featured gift

Have a friend who REALLY loves Christmas music?




Yes, now even in private moments you can enjoy the gentle melodies of holiday tunes, and imagine you're being bombarded with them in Wall-to-Wall-Mart. The more TP you use, the more it plays. So even if you're having explosive diarrhea you'll never run out of musical entertainment (as long as you don't run out of paper or batteries).

At present it is not available in Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Festivus forms, or with music that can be played year round (such as the Mama's & Papa's "Go Where You Wanna Go").
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17 comments:

  1. AnonymousDecember 11, 2012 at 6:22 AM

    What, no rock?

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  2. Titan Mk6BDecember 11, 2012 at 8:18 AM

    I wanna know where you can get the pink toilet paper.

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  3. AnonymousDecember 11, 2012 at 9:23 AM

    Most of western and nicer hotel public toilets in Japan have "remote control" to select "pleasant sounds" , which are then played (to obscure "natural sounds")

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  4. AnonymousDecember 11, 2012 at 9:30 AM

    I'd be more impressed if it used farts to play the tunes

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  5. SyrlinusDecember 11, 2012 at 9:37 AM

    And how is she "floating" it between her fingers?

    Mk6B: Amazon. It has everything (kinda the virtual Walmart)

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  6. PackerDecember 11, 2012 at 9:41 AM

    That is the worst gift I have ever seen, I was going to say shitiest but the spelling was unclear.

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  7. AnonymousDecember 11, 2012 at 10:47 AM

    I was going to post about the pink toilet paper as well. I remember it being sold in colors when I was young, and then one day it all disappeared. I asked my mom what happened to it and she told me it was found the dye used was found to cause cancer. Early 80's...now I have to Google it to confirm my memory.







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  8. Ms. DonnaDecember 11, 2012 at 10:59 AM

    The gift to ahem end all gifts. Sure our Yak Herder is not a proctologist?

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  9. JaxxyDecember 11, 2012 at 11:08 AM

    Can also be used as a prank if you install it in someone else's bathroom without their knowledge :)

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  10. ndenunzDecember 11, 2012 at 12:08 PM

    How about "Move Like Jagger" for a song?

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  11. Ole Phat StuDecember 11, 2012 at 1:06 PM

    Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "what crappy music!"

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  12. JonoDecember 11, 2012 at 1:38 PM

    I hope it plays "Something in the way she moves."

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  13. AnonymousDecember 11, 2012 at 2:41 PM

    That would be way more fun for someone who hates Christmas music.

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  14. MalDecember 12, 2012 at 6:36 AM

    The only reason to get this would be to install this in someone elses bathroom to piss them off. Or as a secret santa gift when you draw someone you secretly hate.

    Seriously, how many of these things can they sell?

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  15. AnonymousDecember 13, 2012 at 2:09 PM

    Yes the perfect white elephant gift. The picture shows the tp in the over style, if you placed under style would the music playback wards?

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  16. AnonymousDecember 18, 2012 at 5:02 PM

    I resent this. It's is nobody's business how much TP I use, especially when I go the lavatory and discover I am menstruating, but some people are TP Nazis and I don't want to be confronted by someone saying 'I heard the WHOLE of Jingle Bells!'

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So wadda you think?