We have a clock by the front sign-in sheet. It's part of a kitschy ceramic black & white statue made to look like some type of cartoonish farm animal. I have no idea who bought it originally. I've never paid it much attention.
Last night, just after 7:00, I got called that a patient needed to talk to me.
Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page."
Miss Tangent: "Hi! I was there earlier today, for my arm pain. I brought my sister to the appointment. Do you remember?"
Dr. Grumpy: "Yes. What can I do for you?"
Miss Tangent: "I need your help. My sister and I have been arguing since the appointment, and we need to know if that clock statue thing on your front desk is supposed to be a horse or a cow?"
Well which is it Doc? Give it to me straight...
ReplyDeleteLuckily they have their priorities straight.
ReplyDeleteHow can you put up with stuff like that? People calling you at home for this stuff?
ReplyDeleteGives me blog material. Otherwise I can't find a good reason.
ReplyDeleteI'd really like to know what you say to people like this. They tell us we'll need to be polite and professional, but seriously??
ReplyDeleteI told her she could ask Mary at her next visit, and hung up.
ReplyDeleteAt least I was still awake when she called.
Doc, if you come to my blog (to this post that your comment box won't let me put in so I've had to s p a c e i t o u t:
ReplyDeleteh t t p ://absurdoldbird.wordpress.com/2011/02/11/i-got-another-miaowing-award/
you'll find an award waiting for you here... hope you'll accept it, if you don't want it I will understand...
But you can't say I didn't try...
Val
This, along with so many other vignettes you've shared, is not normal behaviour.
ReplyDeleteDr. Grumpy, it is time to accept that YOU are doing something to encourage this. The first step on the road to recovery is to take responsibility.
Please get help before it is too late.
Glad I found your blog. Too funny. You should have answered, "I don't have a clock statue on my front desk." :)
ReplyDeleteNeigh I say
ReplyDeleteIt is neither horse nor cow
Do not ask why I know how
It is udderly and without doubt
Somthing else on a farm you would find
Why just look again, at its behind
I don't want to gloat
But surely it is a goat.
what? you told her to ask Mary at the next visit? Will Mary kill you for that?
ReplyDeleteWow...maybe I should clarify on my voicemail from now on that when we say "for urgent matters after-hours, please page your doctor", I DON'T mean things like "what shape is your clock?" or "can you help me name farm animals?"...stupid me, I didn't think that things like that would need to be clarified, but as your patients have so amazingly shown, that clearly isn't the case.
ReplyDeletewe need a pic of this clock!
ReplyDeleteNo, we really don't , keep the peace no pictures.
ReplyDeleteOur recorded message tells people that the office is closed and when it will reopen. It tells them them to only contact the Dr. for urgent situations. I think the key word here is URGENT.
ReplyDeleteAfter Hours call = EMERGENCY !!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, I am hard pressed to
call a doc after hours to begin with. I have to think I have an anuerism(?) or stroke! Same thought
process I use if I think I need to
call 911.
We have "urgent" in our message. I guess it means different things to everyone.
ReplyDeleteOne possible answer: "Yes, it is. Goodbye." But that would probably make her call again, no?
ReplyDeleteI wanna see a picture!!!
ReplyDeleteI guess I'm more of a pessimist I would have just said 'No' and hung up.
ReplyDeletei wanna see this clock now!
ReplyDeletePicture of this clock please?
ReplyDeleteDo you have any kind of service that triages calls?
ReplyDeleteI know you said you don't think it's right to charge for after hours calls and I definitely agree, but it seems like there ought to be some sort of consequences to discourage calls like this.
Fizzy - One 12 pack of diet coke per offense.
ReplyDeleteIt WAS urgent! They've been arguing for HOURS! oy vey. So sorry.
ReplyDelete"It's a Mongolian yak. Thank you for asking."
ReplyDeleteI have to see a picture of the clock too :) .
ReplyDeleteNow that I'm answering patient calls myself, I may have to change the focus of my blog. Stupid, stupid people.
ReplyDeleteOrder of the day: New answering service, STAT
ReplyDeleteI absolutely can't believe that people have the nerve to call a doctor after hours for such a dumb ass question, you should change answering services. I wouldn't even attempt that. What do you say to these nuts?
ReplyDelete