Sunday, February 27, 2011

Early Sunday morning rounds

I got dragged into the hospital to do a consult, and discovered this line in another doctor's dictation:

"I warned the patient that potential problems could include death, serious complications of death, and severe death."
at

41 comments:

  1. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 10:02 AM

    Is severe death more serious than terminal death?

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  2. mostly cajunFebruary 27, 2011 at 10:17 AM

    Apparently that's some serious sh*t!

    "Not only will it KILL you, but you'll hurt real bad the whole time you're dying."

    MC

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  3. SuFu PhDFebruary 27, 2011 at 10:54 AM

    ebola therapy for the common cold?

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  4. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:03 AM

    So, what I'm getting from this, I think, is that it might kill you. Not that I'm a professional in the matter or anything.

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  5. DixieLaurelFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:20 AM

    Severe death really sucks.

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  6. rnraquelFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:21 AM

    That is hilarious.

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  7. LarsFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:27 AM

    You always need a lot of antibiotics to counter severe death.

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  8. Li'l AzathothFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:33 AM

    "But if you can hold out till spring, they're supposed to be coming out with a new version of death that's going to be way deadlier than anything you can get today."

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  9. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:41 AM

    "But he decided to be born anyway."

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  10. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:51 AM

    "I'm telling you, if there's anything more fun than a 6-year-old who's having his tonsils out, I don't know what it is."

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  11. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:51 AM

    So the patient could die???????

    Just making sure I understand what could happen. I have added an addendum to me will making sure that only artisan soil is used for burial.

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  12. gloria pFebruary 27, 2011 at 12:56 PM

    The dictation says it all but is there anyone who DOESN'T face those potential problems at least once in their lives?

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  13. RehabNurseFebruary 27, 2011 at 1:04 PM

    Doc:

    On notes like that, I always look to see what time they were written, especially if electronic.

    I got one consult I had to read for a doc and I nearly died laughing. When I looked at the time, it was written in the early AM, so I wondered if it counted as "sleep charting".

    BTW Doc called other doc and straightened ours out, which included a redacted note.

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  14. Kat's KatsFebruary 27, 2011 at 1:17 PM

    Well you know that serious complications of death lead to severe death whereas simple serious complications merely lead to death.

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  15. watercolordaisyFebruary 27, 2011 at 1:41 PM

    Bwahahahaaaa!!! I no want the severe death please.

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  16. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 1:56 PM

    1041- perfect. you made my day.

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  17. ERPFebruary 27, 2011 at 2:01 PM

    Signed "Dr Killpatient"

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  18. MDBFebruary 27, 2011 at 2:02 PM

    What about a little death?

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  19. oceankissesFebruary 27, 2011 at 2:40 PM

    So this patient will not only be "merely dead", but they will be "most sincerely dead". That's what I'm talking about...

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  20. PenelopeFebruary 27, 2011 at 2:40 PM

    Wow...he really takes that whole "informed consent" thing seriously!

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  21. Not HouseFebruary 27, 2011 at 2:48 PM

    Ya, but the generic version of death gives you pretty much the same effect, at a fraction of the cost.

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  22. EileenFebruary 27, 2011 at 3:10 PM

    Is acute or chronic death worse?

    PS - blogger refuses to allow me to post anywhere with my google account. Has anyone else had the same problem?

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  23. Ben SFebruary 27, 2011 at 4:24 PM

    So was it real or Dragonism?

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  24. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 4:27 PM

    "Patient decided not to get the pedicure after all."

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  25. Lynda Halliger Otvos (Lynda M O)February 27, 2011 at 4:30 PM

    Eileen, I too have been unable to comment on Blogger for some time. Don’t understand why. had no problems up til a few weeks ago.

    ?~ ! ~ ?

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  26. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 4:50 PM

    "Actually, the procedure would have been safe and effective, but some days you're just not in the mood, you know?"

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  27. AshleyFebruary 27, 2011 at 4:50 PM

    I can take death. I can handle severe death.

    But this entire 'serious complications of death' that I couldn't take! Its either, long and drawn out painful mess or that neither heaven, nor hell will take you...

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  28. pharmacy chickFebruary 27, 2011 at 5:14 PM

    remind me not to be HIS patient ok?

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  29. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 5:14 PM

    "Patient decided to give me my co-pay after all."

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  30. terri cFebruary 27, 2011 at 5:47 PM

    Good gravy. And what might the "complications," let alone the "severe complications," of death be?

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  31. John Going GentlyFebruary 27, 2011 at 5:49 PM

    I am an over cynical nurse working just one day on intensive care! ( and full time on my allotment and field)

    greatblog!

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  32. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 5:54 PM

    how is severe death worse than mild death? are the non-serious complications funny?

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  33. EnfermeroFebruary 27, 2011 at 6:28 PM

    Does this doctor know Miracle Max?

    "Look who knows so much! It just so happens your friend is only mostly dead."

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  34. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 8:49 PM

    death with serious complications = Zombie Apocalypse i.e you still have to go to work and pay taxes

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  35. AnonymousFebruary 27, 2011 at 11:12 PM

    Okay, obviously that's extreme. There are plenty of clueless people out there though so I can (and do) identify with the "CYA" mentality of document, document, document so when Mr. Stupid develops serious complications and/or dies, the family can't say "Dr. DamnGoodbutCynical told us this xxx (likely elective) procedure would go smoothly no matter what".

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  36. AnonymousFebruary 28, 2011 at 7:34 PM

    What are serious complications of death? Putrefaction? Being autopsied? Turning into adipocere? Being exhumed after turning into adipocere, and having photos of your 'soap mummy' corpses ending up on the Internet? Inquiring minds want to know...

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  37. AnonymousMarch 1, 2011 at 4:35 PM

    "...but the patient decided to be rude to the Head Nurse anyway."

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  38. The MotherMarch 1, 2011 at 11:19 PM

    Yeah, but did he warn him that he could die?

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  39. AnonymousMarch 5, 2011 at 12:35 PM

    The first thing I noticed is it excludes mild death, where one just BARELY dies.

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  40. dr_dreddMarch 5, 2011 at 5:40 PM

    "And then he went off to go storm the castle."

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  41. AnonymousApril 29, 2011 at 2:05 AM

    Did this doctor then prescribe cake?

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So wadda you think?