Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy. You called earlier?"
Mr. Husband: "Hi, doc. Hey, sorry my wife couldn't come to her appointment today. She's had such a bad migraine it's unbelievable. She's been so dizzy with it she can't drive or ride in a car. She can't even get out of bed."
Dr. Grumpy: "I'm sorry. Has it gotten any better this afternoon?"
Mr. Husband: "No, if anything it's worse. She's barely able to move."
Dr. Grumpy: "Can I talk to her?"
Mr. Husband: "Not right now. She's out in the yard climbing a tree, trying to get the cat down. Can she call you back when she's done?"
Say what??? Do you have any normal, sane patients???
ReplyDeleteBrilliant, just brilliant. I'm a new reader (I discovered your blog this week) and I just wanted to say thanks for writing. I appreciate your sense of humour and laughed quite a bit in the process of reading through your archives. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteBrilliant, just brilliant. I'm a new reader (I discovered your blog this week) and I just wanted to say thanks for writing. I really like your sense of humour, and got quite a laugh reading through your archives. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteI wish I was barely able to move. I haven't climbed a tree since I was a kid.
ReplyDeletewow - a true testament to the human spirit and the desire to drive on despite grave odds!
ReplyDeleteWhen I had migraines, I still occasionally had to do mom things--chasing kids, driving cars. Never climbed a tree.
ReplyDeleteThe one thing I never did was miss a neuro appt. They kept me alive.
Migraines do not stop a woman from doing what has to be done. My husband would never climb a tree for a cat either.
ReplyDeleteWhat she told him to say vs. what's actually going on. Hello, passive-aggression calling.
ReplyDeleteFail.
ReplyDeletethanks Grumpy I needed that. I am an often viewer but only leave comments every once in awhile. Keep up the good work! I love it!
ReplyDeleteI've crawled and climbed to do some necessary things, including go after a runaway dog, and then collapsed again after. But dizzy and climbing a tree when husband is in the house on the phone? Not a snowballs chance in you know where!
ReplyDeleteI didn't see that coming! : )
ReplyDeleteHave a great weekend.
I wish you had said"don't you think it should be you in the tree instead of her?' But then he would have said"'hell no, its her cat."
ReplyDeleteWell, in her defense....when my son was born I had an emergency c-section at 1am. By 6am I was taking a shower, by myself (hey, I felt dirty and gross), then the 2nd day at the hospital I had had enough and checked us out of the hospital, an hour after I got home I was cooking dinner, 6 days after my son was born I drove 700 miles to have Christmas with my family, and 4 weeks later I ran 6 miles. So....I can almost understand climbing a tree with a migraine. ;)
ReplyDeleteWow. As a migraine sufferer who knows what it's like to have those headaches so bad you can barely move, I cannot figure this one out at all.
ReplyDeleteKim, of all of the things you mentioned doing,none of them seemed like good decisions.
ReplyDeleteI think she just gave Mr.Husband the old 'I have a headache' routine.......and he fell for it!!
ReplyDeletewow. I remain amazed at the fact that you seem to manage to keep some shred of professionalism while dealing with patients like this.
ReplyDeleteNarcotic request Fail.
ReplyDeleteAnd, why would someone climb a tree to get a cat? The cat will come down sooner or later on its own. Has anyone ever seen a cat skeleton in a tree? I didn't think so.
ReplyDeleteNow you know how I feel. I'm the caretaker in an adult foster care home. One of the residents had "migraines" so bad she couldn't go to rehab all week, but she managed to go shopping every day with her boyfriend. Did I mention she went to the ER 4 out of those 5 days? And that she's on state insurance, so is not going to pay a dime for those trips? And that she has a million pills she could take instead?
ReplyDeleteI call shenanigans. Totally. And I sympathize.
lie FAIL
ReplyDeleteAnonymous at 6:36 pm, what's an "adult foster care home"?
ReplyDeleteLOL! I can honestly say I've never been tempted to climb a tree while I was suffering from a migraine. Now, as a child, I *may* have been climbing a tree directly before the sudden onset of a migraine (concussion, anyone?)...and/or broken wrist... :-/ You have the funniest patients, Dr. Grumpy!!
ReplyDeleteThey live here and go to rehab at a nearby hospital -- they're all over 18 -- because of physical, emotional, whatever sort of impairments they can't live alone and need help with various activities of daily living. I don't know how else to describe it. The goal is to get them to relearn independent living skills and get out of here back to their families or whatnot. Does that help?
ReplyDeleteSo instead of driving her up the walls it's driving her up the tree(s)...? Nutcase (the husband, probably).
ReplyDeleteSounds like someone doesn't want to pay the co-pay because they didn't give notice in time, so they are trying to make excuses so you won't bill them for it due to an extraordinary circumstance...
ReplyDeleteMaybe the tree IS her bed?
ReplyDeleteMust be one of those magic migraines that just keeps you from doing the things you don't want to do, like go to work, but let you do all the fun things. Sort of like the nausea that asks for a work excuse, while sittong in triage eating cheetos.
ReplyDeleteWord verification: turbonet. It's like a regular net, but faster...