Friday, September 17, 2010

Skool Nerse Time

This is Mrs. Grumpy. Yes, another exciting school year has begun, and I'd like to share a short play with you.


Kid walks into my office today, doing some sort of weird I-can't-hold-still dance move.

Nurse Grumpy: "What's up?"

Little kid: "My butt itches!"

Nurse Grumpy: "Have you tried scratching it?"

Kid scratches ass for 10 seconds.

Little kid: "Thanks nurse, that feels much better." (leaves my office)
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13 comments:

  1. AnonymousSeptember 17, 2010 at 9:32 PM

    I'd just like to say -- I have so many good memories of my elementary school nurse. She was an older lady who had been a nurse during WW2. Talk about hardcore.

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  2. RathskellerSeptember 17, 2010 at 9:42 PM

    always consult a professional, I say.

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  3. CSeptember 17, 2010 at 9:45 PM

    Tell him to stop chewing his nails.

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  4. pharmacychickSeptember 17, 2010 at 9:50 PM

    dont shake hands...dont shake hands..dont shake hands...

    ReplyDelete
  5. CSeptember 17, 2010 at 10:27 PM

    @pharmacychick Nasty..nasty..nasty

    ReplyDelete
  6. AngelaSeptember 18, 2010 at 12:26 AM

    LOL!! I miss the Skool nerse time! so very amusing :D!

    Kids say/do the darnedest things!

    xx
    Jaxs

    ReplyDelete
  7. MahaSeptember 18, 2010 at 1:59 AM

    Saving one itchy butt at a time! You're all sorts of awesome :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. UnknownSeptember 18, 2010 at 9:09 AM

    Isn't it great the kid was first sent to the school nurse (who is a mother)? She knew by the dance kid hadn't just scratched (kid was in school, you aren't supposed to do that). But what if fancy doctor got a hold of kid? Not Grumpy but Dr. Brilliant. Kid would be put through million dollar tests and skin graft before anybody realized he just needed to scratch. That's why we have the wise Skool Nerse!

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  9. The MotherSeptember 18, 2010 at 11:15 AM

    I do hope said kid was persuaded to wash his hands before returning to class and giving everybody pinworms.

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  10. AnonymousSeptember 18, 2010 at 12:28 PM

    OMG....is there really a human out there who does not have the brains to SCRATCH his own ASS?

    Please try to infect this kid with mumps in an attempt to keep his DNA from spreading!

    Pattie, RN

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousSeptember 18, 2010 at 6:43 PM

    I once had a patient who was complaining that he hadn't urinated for 2 days. Bladder scan: >700ml. I asked the patient if he thought he could urinate in the toilet. He said yes (and did).

    Still trying to figure out why he didn't just go by himself...

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  12. KylaSeptember 18, 2010 at 9:07 PM

    LOL! You'd really get a kick out of my youngest, she and her school nurse are great friends. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Just a little snarkySeptember 20, 2010 at 8:13 AM

    I went to the dr. in 1989 for a probable concussion (headache for 5 days in a row after bumping head really hard). Here is what he said:

    Dr: Take tylenol as needed. If you lose consciousness, call me.

    WTF? How can I call him if I am unconscious?

    ReplyDelete

So wadda you think?