Monday, August 30, 2010

Attention Drug Rep!

Thank you for bringing lunch today.

I am married. You may not have noticed my ring. Or my kid's drawings all over the place. Or the brief phone call I had with Mrs. Grumpy in front of you to work out who's picking up the tribe tonight.

Batting your eyelashes, adjusting yourself in your chair so that all of us could see you're wearing a thong, talking about how lonely you are being new in this town, and giving me a card with your home phone on it "just in case you have questions about the drug, or anything else" does NOT score you points in my office.

Try the plastic surgeon downstairs. His trophy wife (3rd wife, 28 years younger then he is) just turned 35, so he's likely looking for a newer model.

Thank you.

30 comments:

  1. Maybe she was sampling the product.

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  2. Anything more obvious you could have done?

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  3. One of my co-workers and I are documenting all of the ridiculous things drug companies teach these people in "Drug Rep School: How to Be Sleazier than a Car Salesman... and Somehow, More Annoying, Too." We are having a super fun time as we have plenty of material.

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  4. The Evil ReceptionistAugust 30, 2010 at 8:46 PM

    Gah, I know that rep. I also know her male counterpart, who is more than annoyingly creepy.

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  5. I'd rather have a free pen! What a trade off.

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  6. nothing wrong with a bit of window shopping tho. u dont have to buy.

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  7. "Oh, I've got this BIG old prescription pad [fingering it] and I just CAN'T think of enough non-generic drugs to prescribe with it [twirling pen suggestively]. What IS a poor little neurologist like me to DO?"

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  8. Hmm. I've always thought it would be cool to go to one of those drug rep sponsored luncheons, but now I think it's probably easier just letting my dad bring me home slices of left-over pie from them.

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  9. Re: Trophy wife comment...we had one of those "marrying men" in our office. We always referred to his present wife as "The Future Former Mrs. X." He went through 3 while I was there (10 years).....

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  10. Hooray for Dr. Grumpy!!!!! It is always refreshing to hear from folks whose families matter--who are offended by the idea that they could be attracted by a little sleaze! Also, the drug rep sounds awful.

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  11. There There Dr. G.....She had to try.

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  12. Glad to know that YOU are way above *scoring points* in your office!
    I am certain that Mrs G is too ;-)

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  13. Ack - Charm School 101! - I guess she thought that the old bumper sticker "Those woman who think that the way to a mans heart is through his stomach are aiming about 6 inches too high" as a real slogan... Oh dear. You've gotta tell us what drugs she was pushing.In your face. :>

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  14. Back in high school, she wouldn't have given you the time of day.

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  15. Poor drug rep. How could she resist your obvious charms?

    All the good guys are married.

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  16. So a plasstic surgeon is a vain man-whore? I am shocked!

    (not)

    Pattie, RN

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  17. The Doubletree lady brings us cookies. Works better w/a mostly female staff. :)

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  18. @Erin - once you have the documentation done, or at least a good "top ten", you should make a cafepress shop. I'm sure that there are tons of offices that would dearly love having mugs, posters, etcetera. ::weg::

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  19. You mean she didn't get up on your desk and do a dance? What the hell kind of sales rep is she? That's going to reflect poorly on her sales!

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  20. For the record, water cooler/ dispenser salesmen? Also slimy and clueless.

    Dude, it's a wedding ring. Those 50,000 pictures unprofessionally posted in my workspace are of my husband and children, yes. And I sent my boss up front to talk to you (and did not reappear) because you squick me out.

    Do NOT call me the next day asking for a date.

    Thank you.


    *headdesk*

    So in other words, Dr. Grumpy... my sympathies, LOL.

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  21. Creepy.

    Tell her that you are unimpressed by the argumentum tripodium and watch her look confused.

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  22. As an FP I don't prescribe expensive enough drugs to have merited such attention. Or perhaps I failed to notice as I cleaned the baby barf off my shirt.

    [The Placebo Journal had a hilarious poster (Diary of a New Drug Rep) concerning the phenomenon you describe but one can no longer read the entire piece online.]

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  23. Dr Grumpy, you should be flattered that she thinks that you are attractive enough to flirt with, and just accept that there are some things which you can't change.

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  24. Good timing - the newspaper comic "The Meaning of Lila" has the main character (Lila) in training as a drug rep. It's this exact thing.

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  25. Slime alert!!! Will you be filing sexual harassment charges? Or at the very least, reporting her conduct to her company?

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  26. EWW, Drug Reps.

    I miss the super cool pens, post-its and dinners at Morton's.

    I don't miss the resulting slime coating which came from standing in their presence, the orange residue from their spray-on tans or the spots in front of my eyes from staring at their overly whitened teeth. Oh, or the way they hunted *shudder*.

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  27. Sheesh, nobody has ever hit on me..I must look like a chimpanzee.

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  28. Somehow I read the last paragraph as the Dr. had just turned 35 not the wife. I was really trying to figure out how she was 28 years younger!

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  29. You STUD, you!!! Take it in the spirit it was delivered!! You're HOT, Grumpy!!!

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So wadda you think?