Now THIS patient, you've got to love! Maybe you could keep him around, for when your other patients say idotic things. He could say what you want to, but can't!
I think someone needs to commission some research into this - can I suggest that there may be a new, super-virulent infection going around - bacterius stupidius.
I am almost positive that many of your patients have been afflicted (100% positive in the case of the the penis guy). I see some warning signs and recommend that you follow a strict hygiene regime in order to prevent infection occurring.
From experience two asprin and some bedrest may help, and failing that, you may find some relief in reading War and Peace, assuming that is, that it is not too late.
Logically, there is another possibility: that the condition could have changed somehow, but in a way that was qualitatively no better or worse than its original state. So at least you ruled this out.
I just sent this to a friend of mine who is in her 3rd year at medical school, to let her know that a specialty in neurology and several years of practice don't prevent these moments. She'll feel better for it. She feels like this ALL THE TIME right now.
Back in med school days, a cousin was feeling ill at a family event. I told her that one of two things would happen, "Eventually, you'll get better, or you'll die."
Much later, she told me she had become much more ill for the next month or two and that my statement that one way or the other, she wouldn't stay as bad as she was helped her get through the illness.
Awesome.
ReplyDeleteI love that he told you that it sounded stupid. Imagine the patient that would have said, "Okay."
ReplyDeleteThey're rubbing off on you. Quick take a vacation before your brain is completely sucked.
ReplyDeleteNow THIS patient, you've got to love! Maybe you could keep him around, for when your other patients say idotic things. He could say what you want to, but can't!
ReplyDeleteI think someone needs to commission some research into this - can I suggest that there may be a new, super-virulent infection going around - bacterius stupidius.
ReplyDeleteI am almost positive that many of your patients have been afflicted (100% positive in the case of the the penis guy). I see some warning signs and recommend that you follow a strict hygiene regime in order to prevent infection occurring.
From experience two asprin and some bedrest may help, and failing that, you may find some relief in reading War and Peace, assuming that is, that it is not too late.
You're welcome - free of charge.
Dang...that's some wicked prognostication! Perhaps it's time to consult the Magic 8 Ball! LOL
ReplyDeleteSo how hard did Mrs.Grumpy hit you after she read the Mother's Day is Over post?
ReplyDeleteLogically, there is another possibility: that the condition could have changed somehow, but in a way that was qualitatively no better or worse than its original state. So at least you ruled this out.
ReplyDeleteFinally! A patient who knows what he is talking about.. pay attention doctor.
ReplyDeleteYou are a doctor aren't you?
ReplyDeleteDidn't you get a crystal ball with your medical degree?
a patient what went grumpy on dr grumpy himself wow!!!
ReplyDeleteThat patient is awesome. I hope you didn't charge for that visit.
ReplyDeleteJust kidding.
And somewhere, a guy is writing a blog post that begins, "I visited my neurologist today...."
ReplyDeleteJoAnna- I was just getting ready to say that :D
ReplyDeleteMore than once I have caught myself saying the engineering equivalent:
ReplyDelete"Well it's either the hardware, the software or user error."
OMG! You ARE human, Dr. Grumpy! :)
ReplyDeleteWhat were you TRYING to say? How did you manage to rephrase it?
ReplyDeleteWere you low on your diet coke intake that day?
ReplyDeleteI just sent this to a friend of mine who is in her 3rd year at medical school, to let her know that a specialty in neurology and several years of practice don't prevent these moments. She'll feel better for it. She feels like this ALL THE TIME right now.
ReplyDeleteBack in med school days, a cousin was feeling ill at a family event. I told her that one of two things would happen, "Eventually, you'll get better, or you'll die."
ReplyDeleteMuch later, she told me she had become much more ill for the next month or two and that my statement that one way or the other, she wouldn't stay as bad as she was helped her get through the illness.
Well, you are either going to get better and be fine, or get worse and die. See you in 6 months I hope!
ReplyDeletelike when Fudruckers asked my hubby how he wanted his burger cooked and he said "Ummm....somewhere between rare and well done."
ReplyDelete