This is Mrs. Grumpy.
Attention Miss Hogtie, the 3rd grade teacher:
I don't mind treating grown-ups for minor injuries, either.
But when you come to me looking for something you can put on rope burns, that are ONLY around your wrists and ankles, AND which we all know occurred during your recent trip to Vegas with your boyfriend, DON'T try to make up some crap about how you had an accident weeding your backyard. We both know what you REALLY did.
Just take the aloe lotion, and spare me the details.
OMG that's awesome!! My bf's parents came home early while we were having relations in their bed. They found my ex's neckties around the bed posts. So embarassing. Yep-first time meeting them too!
ReplyDeleteShibari rocks!!
ReplyDeleteAhem...or so I've heard.
What happens in Vegas doesn't necessarily stay in Vegas.
ReplyDeleteIf you get rope burns you're using the wrong kinda rope. Just sayin'.
ReplyDelete[and don't use handcuffs, unless you're willing to keep bolt cutters next to the bed. in the event of an emergency the key WILL suddenly disappear, no matter where you, erm, stick it.]
Hell yeah! Sounds like they had a lot of fun!
ReplyDeleteSounds like a Primary Care issue - you can refer them to me for further evaluation and treatment :-)
ReplyDeleteSeriously though - it's pretty amazing the stories that patients come in with.
Rope burns? Bah. Amateurs. Bondage: Ur Doin It Wrong.
ReplyDelete[very mildly NSFW]
***snork***
ReplyDeleteLMBO!!!
She had to be bragging! Otherwise, wouldn't she have just googled an answer to how to care for her injuries?
ReplyDeleteLoose times.
Take the aloe and spare me no details!!
ReplyDeleteToo funny!! I see the lying about the reason to go to the nurse is a widespread problem!
ReplyDeleteSeriously. Do people really think that nurses are that naive?
ReplyDeleteGet the message out there: (experienced) nurses are the LEAST naive people on the planet.
The stories that were confabulated at my triage desk only served to annoy me. Really? You tripped in the shower and landed on a pickle jar? Really? Wow. Fascinating.
You don't have to tell us *how* just tell us where it hurts and what you think might be causing the pain.
Next.
Poor woman. Perhaps you should have suggested a trip to the local sex-shop. They make nice, padded cuffs for that sort of thing.
ReplyDeletenow that's hot!
ReplyDelete-Flavius
Seriously. You'd think she'd at least go to her own doctor or try a home remedy before going to the SCHOOL NURSE! Geez.
ReplyDeleteLOL -- too funny. She wanted you to know 'cause that's why she came up with such a lame excuse. I only wonder why she would want people to know that part of her life.
ReplyDeleteremember, skool nerse is also hot.
ReplyDeleteLOL! This wins this morning's "crack me up" post!
ReplyDelete