I'm with a patient. My cell phone rings. It's the most dreaded caller ID of all: Mrs. Grumpy.
Dr. Grumpy: "Hello?"
Mrs. Grumpy: "Hey, can you pick up Craig on the way home? He's at the police station."
Dr. Grumpy: "OMG! WHAT HAPPENED?!!!"
Mrs. Grumpy: "Nothing. The Boy Scouts are touring it today. I told you that last night."
(long pause)
Dr. Grumpy: "Yes. I knew that."
Mrs. Grumpy: "Idiot."
LOL your wife was nice... I would have played up your cluelessness just a tiny bit ;)
ReplyDelete"Oh you know, got high, stole a car and then got caught with three hookers and a kilo of coke, so I thought i'd let him stew for a bit. Just pick him up whenever you're done at the office."
;)
xx
Jaxs
what, no request for more tomatoes?
ReplyDeleteThe boss is right.
ReplyDeleteIdiot. But we luv ya anyway. ;)
Husbands. You never listen. My husband can actually mimic back word for word what I've said, but then doesn't retain it.
ReplyDeleteSigh.
I like Jackie's idea.
Oh, and my word verification was aphing ;0 Close enough!
Think of it as a trial run for the future. ;-)
ReplyDeleteDon't be so hard on the good Doctor, ladies and gents; his alarmed response was entirely reasonable under the circumstances. It's well-known that the surreptitious pilfering of breakfast pastries is often the first step down the slippery slope that leads to a life of crime.
ReplyDeleteLOL I love the dynamic between you and Mrs Grumpy! But I guess I would have freaked out too because I'm usually not used to picking up people from the police station. Nonetheless that's one funny phone call!
ReplyDeleteNow I know I'm not the only one with an idiot for a husband. Phew!
ReplyDeleteAppreciate the laugh at someone else's experience! Thanks man, I needed that!
ReplyDeleteOH MY GOSH, Mrs. Grumpy could have had so much fun with that one. She could have said in response to you "don't forget to stop by the bank as they only take cash or a cashier's check to post bond."
ReplyDeleteBoy, I would have had so much fun with that one. :)
When I was a teen (I think I was 15 or 16), we were living overseas. I used to hang out at the American army base rec room. I put some money in the coke machine but nothing came out even though I heard a click. So I stuck my hand up the coke machine and my hand got stuck in the coke machine. Anyway, the base fire department showed up and had to take the machine apart to free my hand. It got even worse. They sent me home escorted by two MP's. My father opened up the door and saw two ARMED MPs on each side of me delivering me home. OY, you should have seen the look on his face. He just stood there blinking trying to take in this strange scene. It got even worse when the Army sent my father a bill to fix the coke machine.
You just don't screw with Coca Cola.
ReplyDeleteApparently this is some sort of very common husband/father phenomenon. I had a medical school interview back home the other day. My dad dropped me off on his way to work and told me call if I needed him later. But my mom had told him my brother would be picking me up and I never called. I'm home at around 2:30pm and my mom gets a call from my dad, huffing and all out of breath. The conversation went something like this:
ReplyDeleteMom: "Why are you out of breath?"
Dad: "I'm picking up our daughter from her interview but I think I'm late and I don't want to keep her waiting"
Mom: "She's home. I told you your son and I would go pick her up today!"
Dad: "Well, I thought I missed her call."
Mom: "Was a there a missed call notice on your cell phone?"
Dad: "No."
Mom: "Then you didn't miss her call. [insert exasperated sigh] Just come home."
Well. It just proves that men, whatever colour their skin, whichever part of the earth they are on, are essentially the SAME. This could have been a conversation between the huz & me... The man still call to check, "Where are you honey?" or, "What are you doing now dear?" ALL THE TIME... I mean, wassup with the man?? My schedule is carved in stone due to the kids' various activities, soccer, golf, music, tuitions etc. I can literally 'predict' that I would be driving the twins to piano lesson at 0713hr 36s next Wednesday...
ReplyDeleteSue
We need to start a fan club for your wife now.
ReplyDelete=D
We still love you, though!
When I was 14 years old, my Mom let me borrow her car for the first time (14 was the minimum legal driving age in Idaho at the time). 2 blocks from home, I was hit by a drunk driver (at 4pm).
ReplyDeleteThe police officer asked me to come down to the station to fill out the report. After we were there for a few minutes, he prompted me to call home.
Conversation went something like this:
Me: Hey Dad, Guess where I am? I'm at the Police Station
Oh, man, the call you never want to get. Glad yours worked out so well.
ReplyDeleteI keep a lawyer's phone number on my cell. I have one like that.
when My son was 17 and had just got his license...His first day driving to school, he got in a fender bender. The airbags in his car deployed, and he was taken to the ER just to make sure he was ok. However ....the police called and just said,...."your son has been in an accident, and he is at the hospital." They refused to give me any further info......Talk about shitting your pants.
ReplyDeleteI love Mrs. Grumpy! I hope she'll have more "Skool Nerse" entries!
ReplyDeleteThis is similar to the other husband category phone call: "Honey, what's our health insurance policy number?"
ReplyDeleteStop beating on the men so much, girls. At least these guys CARE about their families!!
ReplyDeleteThere are too many out there that don't give a @#$% about their spouses/kids/girlfriends, etc.
Just be grateful that your "idiot" loves you enough to worry about you!
Ok, rant over.
Had to giggle as this post is so close in spirit to today's "Blondie" cartoon, where a simple question from the teen son sends both parents out of their chairs.....
ReplyDelete"So, did you guys ever think about what it would be like to be grandparents?"
Ok, I'm developing a girl crush on Mrs. Grumpy. :)
ReplyDelete