A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Another fine patient quote
"It's such an unexplainable thing, because, you know, I can't explain it. It's like something that is totally, entirely, not explainable, because no matter how much I try to explain it, it's still unexplainable. Does that explain it?"
I had a symptom I described to my doctor as "consistently intermittent" - then laughed, and asked if that even made any sense. She chuckled and said it shouldn't, but did.
My favorite patient call today: "Can you tell me if I have any prescriptions ready, and if so, what are they?" Sure. Let's see what the Easter Bunny left for you.
Ah crap, I know exactly what that patient means. I have a 40 year history of a rogue immune system, with many interwoven problems.
My mayo doc has exactly one other patient with the same type of progression. Reams of records on people like me.
We count on kind docs that help us know what's most important. My PCP finally realized I'll always be a 30 minute patient every 2 months and I love him for it. All it took was my mayo doc ordering a bone scan done locally to make my PCP a believer, rather than thinkinig I was a fatsomyalgia pain whiner.
I had a symptom I described to my doctor as "consistently intermittent" - then laughed, and asked if that even made any sense. She chuckled and said it shouldn't, but did.
ReplyDeleteClear as mud!!!!
ReplyDeleteAnyone else read this in the tone of a Valley Girl?
ReplyDeleteYep, cleared that right up, thanks so much!!
ReplyDeleteA horse is a horse, of course of course
ReplyDeleteAnd no one can talk to a horse, of course
That is, of course, unless the horse
Is the famous Mr. Ed.
Go right to the source and ask the horse
He'll give you an answer that you'll endorse
He's always on a steady course
Talk to Mr. Ed.
People yakkity-yak a streak
and waste the time of day
But Mr. Ed will never speak
unless he has something to say.
A horse is a horse, of course, of course,
And this one will talk 'til his voice is hoarse
You never heard of a talking horse?
Well listen to this:
I'm-a grumpy, you're-a grumpy, he's-a grumpy, we're all grumpy, wouldn't you like to be a grumpy, too?
Today's Captcha word is: owdadi.
Think it needs a better explanation :)
ReplyDeletemurgatr
Pharm. Tech. RDC '06
I totally get it. Do you know what I mean? Because I totally know what I mean.
ReplyDeleteI take it the patient was not talking about the ineffability of God...
ReplyDeleteHey Dr. Grumpy,
ReplyDeleteWhat do you think of this "new" pain scale?
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/02/boyfriend-doesnt-have-ebola-probably.html
Sara
Noooooo...
ReplyDeleteWhere are Cheech and Chong when you need a translator?
ReplyDeleteWas your patient G W Bush?
ReplyDeleteMy favorite patient call today:
ReplyDelete"Can you tell me if I have any prescriptions ready, and if so, what are they?"
Sure. Let's see what the Easter Bunny left for you.
@ERP: No, umm, it, umm, was, umm, Barack, umm, Hussein, umm, Obama. Umm.
ReplyDeleteHopalong Ginsberg
Politician in training?
ReplyDeleteAh crap, I know exactly what that patient means. I have a 40 year history of a rogue immune system, with many interwoven problems.
ReplyDeleteMy mayo doc has exactly one other patient with the same type of progression. Reams of records on people like me.
We count on kind docs that help us know what's most important. My PCP finally realized I'll always be a 30 minute patient every 2 months and I love him for it. All it took was my mayo doc ordering a bone scan done locally to make my PCP a believer, rather than thinkinig I was a fatsomyalgia pain whiner.
Attic Aunt