Saturday, February 13, 2010

On call and sick

Call is not joyful,
And fun it is not
When you have to take call
With a nose full of snot.

With a throat full of phlegm
The constant clearing (ahem)
And a head full of pain
And a fuzzy clogged brain

It is so hard to round
When you want to fall to ground
Your muscles are mud
With bad bugs in your blood

And you go home to rest
But the ER knows best
And they dial your cell
So you drive back to hell

But your throat feels sore
So you're a Tylenol whore
With boogers you abhor
Give me Sudafed- MORE!

This fucking sucks
Regardless of the bucks
I hate being on call
That is all.
at

25 comments:

  1. nRTFebruary 13, 2010 at 12:11 PM

    That is the perfect I HATE CALL poem. My husband's personality changes when he is on call. When the cell or pager goes off I cringe. Hope you feel better soon.

    Could make a
    I Hate Call Poem T Shirt (w/o the cold and flu details). I will buy at least 3.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2010 at 12:12 PM

    Dr. G, I hope you feel better soon!

    ReplyDelete
  3. John WoolmanFebruary 13, 2010 at 12:20 PM

    My wife is on call as well this weekend. Sigh. So much for a nice Valentine's Day meal. And she has a streaming cold too! There's a lot of it about and there'll be more after the weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  4. ERPFebruary 13, 2010 at 12:34 PM

    Signed Theodore Giesel-Grumpy MD.

    Feel better

    ReplyDelete
  5. BibliotekarenFebruary 13, 2010 at 12:57 PM

    Well done! I'm a rhyming verse fan having first dabbled with that to tell my cranie story.

    Sorry you're sick. Being ill while being expected to still function in the world is harsh isn't it?

    I'd love to hear more rhyming verse -- when you're feeling better, of course.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Veronica TFebruary 13, 2010 at 1:08 PM

    I have had the worst cold for 2 weeks. I'm also on call tomorrow (overnight until about noon on Monday), albeit as a third year medical student, but I feel your pain.

    Feel better, Dr. G!

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2010 at 1:09 PM

    yes

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2010 at 1:13 PM

    Hope you can look forward to a hot shower (to help flush out the phlegm), a hot cup of tea (or other drink that soothes throat and keeps you from dehydration), hot salt water gargle, and a 5-hour phone call-free afternoon nap soon.

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2010 at 1:22 PM

    I just got rid of a bad head cold a few days ago myself... couldn't breathe or sleep much, and I still had my night shift job to show up for. Just boring shelf stacking, at least. I sympathise.

    ReplyDelete
  10. terri cFebruary 13, 2010 at 1:56 PM

    Truly splendid poem. Sorry you are ill, and hope you can infect some worthy souls while on call. I am on call with a broken bone in my foot.

    ReplyDelete
  11. The Nallac ManFebruary 13, 2010 at 2:02 PM

    I do not like green snot and phlegm,
    I do not like them, Sick-I-Am.

    Would you like them in your nose?
    Would you like them on your toes?

    Would you like them in your pocket?
    Would you like them in the light socket?

    Not in my nose,
    Not on my toes,
    Not in my pocket,
    Not in the light socket,

    I do not like green snot and phlegm,
    I do not like them, Sick-I-Am.

    Would you like them on your Wii?
    Would you like them in your tea?

    Would you like them on your toast?
    Would you like them with your pot roast?

    ReplyDelete
  12. bellivasFebruary 13, 2010 at 2:41 PM

    extreme laughter!i was laughing until i felt tears!sofia ,from greece ,pulmonologist.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Reality JayneFebruary 13, 2010 at 3:32 PM

    So what your trying to say is....your a little under the weather?....hehehe

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2010 at 4:53 PM

    Oh my G.D.
    That was... profound.

    ReplyDelete
  15. student dr. blazeFebruary 13, 2010 at 4:53 PM

    Wow. You do realize that most people can't write that well when they're healthy, don't you? It may be time for you to start penning the next great book, be it poetry or prose. Very impressive. *applauds*

    ReplyDelete
  16. MooseFebruary 13, 2010 at 6:03 PM

    Poor Doctor Grumpy
    It truly sucks being sick
    So please get well soon

    All us Grumpy fans
    worry so much about you
    Aardvarks are cool beasts

    There is nothing worse
    than trying to round with the
    Plastic bear vomit

    [today's captcha word
    is "ledial" -- this must be
    French: turn le dial]

    ReplyDelete
  17. J-Quell'nFebruary 13, 2010 at 6:26 PM

    Awww...feel better, Grumps <3

    ReplyDelete
  18. Chrysalis February 13, 2010 at 6:38 PM

    Hope you feel better soon.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Sunflower RNFebruary 13, 2010 at 6:54 PM

    I feel for you. I was quietly recovering from a nice little concussion (tripped and fell into the wall at work) when along came the cold from hell, so now I am tired and dizzy and snotty. Good job on the poem. Hope you feel (fell) better soon.

    ReplyDelete
  20. DanaFebruary 13, 2010 at 7:05 PM

    I hope you feel better soon. May all the calls you take be necessary. May all the doctors/nurses/patients be nice and respectful. May you get enough rest so that you are well enough to work next week.

    ReplyDelete
  21. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2010 at 8:21 PM

    Two too clever poets. Hope the colds pass quickly (as well as the on-call duty).

    ReplyDelete
  22. MahaFebruary 13, 2010 at 10:43 PM

    Bravo!

    If you have to be sick, at least you got a brilliant poem out of it! Mango green tea with honey is your friend.

    ReplyDelete
  23. PediFebruary 14, 2010 at 10:44 AM

    Wow it seems like you are always on call. Maybe you need more call partners?

    ReplyDelete
  24. ShrinkingDocFebruary 17, 2010 at 1:07 PM

    You ROCK!

    Hope you're feeling better.

    ReplyDelete
  25. TracyKMFebruary 17, 2010 at 5:09 PM

    Sounds a lot like being an at-home mom while sick.
    I highly recommend a Neti pot!

    ReplyDelete

So wadda you think?