Doctor Grumpy in the House

 See you next year!

Several months ago Mary and her family got a new puppy. He's still a puppy, but these days he's a 70 pound puppy. He has a lot of en...

 "What should we name our stroke study? Something positive, scientific sounding, helpful..."

Mary: "Okay, on Tuesday Dr. Grumpy can see you at 11:00, or on Thursday we can do 4:15, or on..." Mary took a sip of too-hot coffe...

Body armor? Check. Taser? Check. Pepper spray? Check. Marie riding shotgun on the cart with a baseball bat and tranquilizer gun? Check. Head...

Dr. Grumpy: "Any major illnesses run in your family?" Ms. Daughter: "My dad had cancer. That's about it." Ms. Mother...

Dr. Grumpy: "Are you allergic to any medications?" Ms. Sesame: "I'm allergic to all medications that have a letter 'D...

Dr. Grumpy: "What have your blood pressures been running at home?" Mr. Decimal: "They average 127.384 over 73.879"

 

With the costume party season upon us, I'd like to remind everyone of what was probably the single greatest newspaper headline ever.

Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page." Mr. Bacon: "Hi, Dr. Grumpy, I need to get in to see Dr. Needle urgently, ...

Dr. Grumpy: "So... this visit is to follow-up on how you're doing with the medication - Fliniberzap - that I prescribed about a mon...

Mary: "Okay, Mrs. Humor, I have your follow-up down for next Tuesday, at 8:15 a.m. I should warn you that Wednesday's test of the n...

 Current insurance company hold music is an endless loop of "O Fortuna."