Dr. Grumpy: "Any major illnesses run in your family?"
Ms. Daughter: "My dad had cancer. That's about it."
Ms. Mother: "I have high blood pressure."
Ms. Daughter: "No you don't."
Ms. Mother: "Yes, I do. I take Petrolololololol for it."
Ms. Daughter: "You have high blood pressure, and you take medication for it? How come I never knew this?"
Ms. Mother: "It's not a big deal. Most people my age are being treated for high blood pressure."
Ms. Daughter: "It's like my whole fucking life I'm living a lie."
Ms. Mother: "Of course you are...do you really want to hear my honest opinions about...."
ReplyDelete"Also, I'm not actually your mother."
ReplyDelete"But our entire religion is based on the idea that there's no such thing as high blood pressure! Next you're going to tell me that the Great Wombat God Wagyadik doesn't exist! WERE ALL THOSE HUMAN SACRIFICES FOR NOTHING???"
ReplyDelete"When you offered me $50 to come with you to the doctor and pretend to be your daughter, I wasn't expecting this."
ReplyDelete