So recently I let an irresponsible adult treasured child of mine borrow my car, and they got a speeding ticket.
This alone wouldn't have been a big deal, but the police officer mistakenly entered the car's registration info on the citation form. So the citation was in my name, not the (allegedly) adult person who was driving it.
To get it dismissed, I had to go to Grumpyville City minor offenses court with proof that I was in my office at the time, dragging (reluctantly on their part) the person who'd been behind the wheel.
Misdemeanor court, at least in Grumpyville, is one of the best, yet unheard of, sources of entertainment. The cases are in front of the judge, each lasting 2-3 minutes. For the price of the parking garage it's like watching a bunch of movie shorts in rapid fire, one after the other, separated by the judge saying "NEXT!"
Two cases really stood out. Here's one:
Judge Judy: "Okay, there are 4 charges against you. I'll read them off, and you'll plead either guilty or not guilty after each. If you plead guilty your case will be moved on for sentencing at a later date, if you plead not guilty it will be referred to the city attorney's office to schedule a hearing on the charges. Do you understand me?"
Ms. Klepto: "Yes."
Judge Judy: "Charge one: July 21, 2026, shoplifting from the Grumpyville Grand Resort Gift Shop."
Ms. Klepto: "Not guilty."
Judge Judy: "Charge two: July 22, 2026, shoplifting from the Grumpyville Grand Resort Gift Shop."
Ms. Klepto: "Not guilty."
Judge Judy: "Charge three: July 23, 2026, shoplifting from the Grumpyville Grand Resort Gift Shop."
Ms. Klepto: "Not guilty."
Judge Judy: "Charge four: July 24, 2026, trespassing at the Grumpyville Grand Resort after being banned from the premises for shoplifting."
Ms. Klepto: "Not guilty."
Apparently Einstein didn’t actually say “Doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results is the definition of insanity” but it certainly is a marker of profound stupidity.
ReplyDeleteAfter practicing law for 40 years, you kinda get used to it. I had to explain that long ago to a defendant that because he was a first offender under $1000 on a shoplifting he is going to get a dismissal of his case in one year if he behaves himself, he tells me, but I really did forget to pay. when I walked out a big box carrying $500 worth of tools. I asked him how many times do you think a judge has heard that tale and how about the prosecutor do you think he would believe that when you were seen in the store removing merchandise from one box and putting it into a lesser price box, I’m not really that kind of person. I’m married with two children, and I really did forget.
ReplyDeleteI can get you the dismissal provided you can do your part and stay clean for a year. Deal is done. The clock is ticking one year. What are the odds?