Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page."
Mr. Lacune: "Hi, thish ish Dave Lacune, you shaw me at the hoshpital a few days ago, when I had a shtroke."
Dr. Grumpy: "Yes sir, are you okay? Your speech is pretty slurred, and I don't remember it having been affected by the stroke."
Mr. Lacune: "I'm fine. Look, you preshcribed Nomocva to me, to keep me from having another a shtroke, but I read about all itsh shide effectsh, and sho now I shtopped it and I'm afraid to take it."
Dr. Grumpy: "I'm kind of concerned you've had another stroke, sir. Your speech is pretty slurred."
Mr. Lacune: "Nah, my shpeech ish like thish because I've been doing tequila shotsh and shmoking weed all night because I'm anxioush."
Pause
Dr. Grumpy: "What are you so anxious about?"
Mr. Lacune: "Becaushe I shtopped Nomocva, sho now I'm worried I might have another shtroke."
Screw you and your medical training. I'm going to stick with self medicating with booze and weed.
ReplyDeleteHow fortunate that tequila and weed don't have any known side effects.
ReplyDeleteDo you think I could have his nomocva, my insurance company just scratched it off the list because it’s too expensive and they want me to go to start taking rat poison ,I think that could just be a bloody mess
ReplyDelete(in my best infomercial voice)...
ReplyDeleteWeed fixes everything these days, doncha know?
Anxiety!
Seizure disorder!
Stroke!
Fractured legs!
Even decapitations can be cured by smoking a few joints!
Buy a week's supply now for $99.99, or 5 easy payments of $24.95
I have reached the point in life where I’m no longer surprised by the stupidity of people
ReplyDelete"Eshpecially after I finish all thoshe burgersh and tacosh I jusht ordered from Jack-in-the-Boxsh."
ReplyDeleteI hate it when people confirm they are stupid. Not that I'm guilty of such thinking, no sirree, not me. You want me to take what??? I've heard about the side effects....
ReplyDeleteIn calmness, you deserve tequila and weed; in worry, you need it.
ReplyDelete