Dr. Grumpy: "How's she doing with the new medication?"
Mrs. Daughter: "Calmer, but she still treats me like a child."
Mrs. Dementia: "Are we at the doctor's yet?"
Mrs. Daughter: "Mom, this is the doctor."
Mrs. Dementia: "How do you do? This is my daughter."
Mrs. Daughter: "He's met us before, mom."
Dr. Grumpy: "How are you feeling, Barbara?"
Mrs. Dementia: "Don't talk back to me, young man!"
Mrs. Daughter: "Mom, he's the..."
Mrs. Dementia: "You don't talk back to me, either! Go to your room, right now!"
Dr. Grumpy: "Barbara, it's okay."
Mrs. Dementia: "And you're grounded, young man!"
This would be truly funny if it weren’t also so very poignant. Damn that dementia...
ReplyDelete"Sorry, honey, I really wish I could go with you to 'Celine Dion on Ice,' but Mrs. Dementia says I'm grounded. What can I do?"
ReplyDeleteSo, do I need to cancel my appointment then?
ReplyDeleteone of the saddest instances with dementia that I've witnessed was a couple who had been married for 50+ years. the husband had advanced dementia. His wife asked him if he knew who she was. He replied: "I'm sorry, I'm not sure who you are. But if you can wait a little bit, I'm sure my wife will be right back and she can help you."
ReplyDeleteDementia is such a cruel disease but there are definitely moments of humour. My favourite moment was when my sweet, kind Nan told my Aunt that she was a dump who had ugly shoes! While I disagree with the dump statement her shoes were pretty unattractive!
ReplyDeleteWhat a horrible illness! And you can’t unscramble an egg..
ReplyDeleteOh, so much humor. I had taken my mid-stage mother to her church. The cantor starts singing in an admittedly unpleasant, high, screechy voice. My mother bellows, "Oh My God! She sounds like she's stranging a chicken!" Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, turned to look. I tried to crawl under the pew but there wasn't enough room.
ReplyDeleteMy child the nurse one says that when a dementia patient gets hospitalized, the caregiving family disappears for a few days. She says they are exhausted and need a break. She says no one questions or judges, they emphasize. She then tells us amusing story of patient who called every other nurse Alexa the rest Siri and insisted Alexa was not that good.
ReplyDeleteMy father-in-law had dementia. He was pretty much non-verbal toward the end and he was unable to walk without assistance. One day, we were at the home of my in-laws. We were in the kitchen and he was sitting in the living room, pretty much asleep. Suddenly, he yelled and we went running to see what was wrong. He very loudly and clearly said "I AM SITTING ON MY TESTICLES AND I CAN'T STAND IT!". We couldn't help but laugh...all of us, including my almost 90 year old mother-in-law. It was just the funniest thing during that time of stress. It might not sound funny now, perhaps you had to be there, but it was truly hysterical at the time. He died a month later.
ReplyDeleteSo many kinds of dementia, so much humor. You can only laugh and be patient. Without the gift of laughter, the task of caring would be much tougher.
ReplyDeleteExample, my dad thought the screensaver on a hospital computer was violent. So I touched two keys and told him I had changed the channel. He said, "That's better now!" and settled in for a good watch. Five minutes later, he yelled "I've got bingo!"
I never knew my dad knew how to play bingo.
A few years ago, my phone rang at 3:00am. It was my elderly neighbor Alice. She told me there was a strange man in her house and she didn't know what to do. I told her I would call the police and asked her if she was able to leave the house. She answered yes, so I told her I would meet her at the end of the driveway. I called 911 and told them what was going on then went and got my neighbor and brought her into my house. A few minutes later about 6 or 7 police cars were in front of our houses, some of the police went to her house and some to mine and were asking her what was happening. A few minutes later, a policewoman came over and told her that the man in her house says he's her husband. My heart sank when she said..'that's what he tells me too.'
ReplyDeleteThey had me go to her house to make sure he was her husband. They had woke him from a sound sleep. It took a few years before her family finally had to put her in an institution. It was very sad.
Dementia is such a sad situation, but can be so funny. My dad was just at the beginning of his journey & losing his filters. He was temporarily in a nursing home after falling & I noticed he seemed a bit agitated. I asked if he was OK & he said - loudly - "My balls itch!" He never would have said that before & I cracked up.
ReplyDelete