Mary: "Dr. Grumpy's office, this is Mary."
Mrs. Grate: "I need to make an appointment with Dr. Darth."
Mary: "I'm sorry, you've got the wrong office. This is Dr. Grumpy's."
Mrs. Grate: "Okay, but I'd like to see Dr. Darth. Does he have anything open on Thursday?"
Mary: "Dr. Darth is across the street, you'll have to call his office. Let me give you their number."
Mrs. Grate: "If you have the number, can you please call them? I'd like something for Thursday, preferably in the afternoon."
Mary: "Ma'am, I can't make an appointment for you at another neurologist's office. I don't know what their schedule is, or what insurances they take, or their hours..."
Mrs. Grate: "You young people have never heard of customer service."
click
If Mary can reach through the phone line to make that appointment, then surely she can administer a bit of a virtual 'snap' of the fingers, to undo the spells these callers have entranced themselves? If not a 'snap' then maybe a 'slap' upside the head, his, enough of some sort of shake-up--through the phone line, of course. Or, maybe, it's just the nature of the business, Dr. G.
ReplyDeleteLucky thing you didn't know about this ahead of time, or she might be a little upset of 'this' part of the duties when she applied for the job. Somewhere, somehow, out there, Mary is building up a load of karma for when she retires. She better have a nice pension!
>What time does the lab open? Do I need to fast for the test?
ReplyDelete>I don't know, ma'am, You've called x-ray.
>I know, but they're right next door to you. Don't you know their hours?
>No, they recently changed their hours. But I can give you their phone number.
>Well, can't you tell me whether I need to fast?
>No, here's their phone number........
.........at least, half a dozen times a day...............
Thursday, not a problem, what time would you like ? You will not get a call confirming the appointment so please make sure you arrive on time.
ReplyDeleteWe here at Dr. Darth pride ourselves on patient service. Have a nice day.
I'm sorry, Ma'am. Customer Service is for customers. You are not one.
ReplyDelete"This darn newfangled telephone contraption has ruined everything."
ReplyDelete"Can you dial it for me? I have achey fubgers."
ReplyDeleteReferral for neuro consult coming in 3 . . .2 . . .1
ReplyDelete"Oh, come on, everyone knows that you're all just branches of the same company, like airport shops."
ReplyDelete"Why can't you be more like that nice 'Siri' from the commercials?"
ReplyDeleteDo people really, truly say these things?
ReplyDeleteAll the time.
ReplyDeleteNurse Lilly ftw.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous at 2:01 -- I'm x-ray above
ReplyDeleteWe also get
> can i leave this specimen with you, the lab is closed
>no, I don't know which doctor i saw, can't you phone them (not with writing i can't read, and no phone number i can't)
>now that i have registered here, can i go next door and register with the lab (only if you can hear us call your name next door)
>i can't find my health card -- you must have kept it ........(and after insisting we don't have it, and the patient yelling at us that we must have it, she fumbles through her purse and says, 'oh, here it is' But NEVER and apology for yelling)
And then you get the nicest patient who says thank you, and smiles, or even brings you a box of chocolates because you fit them into a space that doesn't exist, and you forget the a**holes.
"I'd make the appointment myself, but I'm only allowed this one phone call."
ReplyDelete"So why did Dr. Darth give me this number?"
ReplyDeleteReminds me of the time I was working for a hospital physical therapy clinic in the era before computers. I answered a call, and a woman said she wanted to make a mammogram appointment. I pointed out that this was the Physical Therapy clinic, and as such I couldn't do that. I gave her the number to Radiology and transferred her. The phone rang again, and it was the same woman telling me that Radiology wasn't answering their phone, and could I make her a mammogram appointment. I again pointed out that I couldn't do that, and gave her the number once again. She then informed me that she wasn't going to have time to call later, so I needed to make a mammogram appointment for her. Again I told her I couldn't, and that she'd have to call Radiology. Eventually she must have gotten through, because I never heard from her again. Still, what part of "this isn't the right clinic" was so hard to understand?
ReplyDeleteI used to own a little yarn shop and people said this to me on a regular basis. Why no, we don't carry Ugly Synthetic Yarn so we can't exchange it for lovely all-wool yarn.
ReplyDelete