Thursday, April 2, 2015

Rockin' down the highway

Dr. Grumpy: "At your last visit you were having migraines with orgasm, and so I started you on medication. Has it helped?"

Mr. Class: "I think so, I mean, I had my girlfriend suck me off on the drive here, and everything was okay."

Dr. Grumpy: (completely at a loss for words) "Um..."

Mr. Class: "Also, can you write a note to get me out of a traffic ticket?"
at

35 comments:

  1. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 5:51 AM

    Can't wait to hear Officer Cynical ' s take on this one.

    As for you, Dr G, your powers never cease to amaze me!

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 8:39 AM

    TMI OMG---so sorry, God, I didn't mean to use your name in vain, but can You just believe it?

    ReplyDelete
  3. LokiApril 2, 2015 at 8:54 AM

    If only there were some way to siphon off that degree of stupid and then export it.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 9:05 AM

    my gag reflex was just activated

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 9:19 AM

    At least he wasn't having seizures with orgasms.

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  6. Officer CynicalApril 2, 2015 at 9:38 AM

    "Sign here. Press hard, 3 copies."

    ReplyDelete
  7. The Condign GentlemanApril 2, 2015 at 11:14 AM

    "It's not what you think. She's the one who was driving."

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 11:15 AM

    "At least it's only a traffic ticket. You should have seen what happened the time we took the bus."

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  9. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 11:21 AM

    "Stupid seat belt laws."

    ReplyDelete
  10. gloriapApril 2, 2015 at 12:30 PM

    TMI. There is no way I can possibly un-read that. I was called for jury duty yesterday for a DUI case. I can't imagine what THIS one would be like.

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 12:39 PM

    I think we neutered the girlfriend's dog. I remember she showed me how she was going to miss fondling Fluffy's balls while watching TV.

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  12. was1April 2, 2015 at 4:48 PM

    cop: you were doing 69 in a 45 zone.
    driver: honest, officer... I wasn't even touching her.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Gracie's MomApril 2, 2015 at 5:00 PM

    Boy, you get all the winners at your practice! I hope you refused the Doctors note.

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 5:11 PM

    "On second thought, better make it two notes. There's still the drive back home after this appointment is over."

    ReplyDelete
  15. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 5:18 PM

    "What else am I supposed to do? There's nothing good on the radio these days now that all the stations have been taken over by Clear Channel."

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  16. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 6:31 PM

    "Well, my car's cupholders are designed for a Big Gulp."

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  17. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 6:32 PM

    "I was also eating my Taco Bell breakfast wrap while she was doing it. It's all about multitasking."

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  18. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 6:33 PM

    "In retrospect, I probably should have waited till I was parked before I posted the photos on my Facebook page."

    ReplyDelete
  19. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 6:38 PM

    Don't you just love Uber?

    ReplyDelete
  20. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 6:47 PM

    "What can I say- no woman can resist a guy on a Segway..."

    ReplyDelete
  21. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 6:58 PM

    "Otherwise, I'll have to go to traffic school, and it's just so boring. If only I could think of some way to make it less boring..."

    ReplyDelete
  22. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 7:01 PM

    "I'm just a Corinthian leather daddy..."

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  23. MAApril 2, 2015 at 8:06 PM

    I wonder if he received the traffic ticket during his trip to the doctor. I'd be distracted if I was trying to drive during a romantic moment.

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  24. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 8:46 PM

    "I blew a stop sign."

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  25. AnonymousApril 2, 2015 at 9:10 PM

    I love that your readers have delightfully twisted, sick senses of humor!

    ReplyDelete
  26. HeidiApril 3, 2015 at 9:12 AM

    That wording..."had my gf suck me off" makes me feel very sorry for the girlfriend.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Arzt4EmpfaengerApril 3, 2015 at 6:35 PM

    Those people really exist?! D:

    ReplyDelete
  28. rjsApril 3, 2015 at 10:19 PM

    They not only exist, but they're eligible to vote!

    ReplyDelete
  29. bobbieApril 4, 2015 at 11:13 AM

    And they breed!

    ReplyDelete
  30. AnonymousApril 4, 2015 at 10:41 PM

    The way he said that -- I need a shower. I hope you refused to give him a note.

    ReplyDelete
  31. jenApril 5, 2015 at 1:56 AM

    i don't think there's enough bleach in the world to purge that image from my brain.

    ReplyDelete
  32. HattieApril 5, 2015 at 5:00 PM

    I think people suck.

    ReplyDelete
  33. lyndat.April 8, 2015 at 10:13 PM

    Jen, You are a HOOOOOOTTTT!!!! I can't get a breath for laughing so hard!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  34. AnonymousApril 28, 2015 at 5:48 AM

    and that is why i wont touch any of my patients without gloves!!

    ReplyDelete

So wadda you think?