Monday, November 3, 2014

Halloween memories - epilogue

For those wondering after reading Friday's post...

This, in memory of my grandfather, is the tie I wore. He bought it as an honest-to-God ordinary tie that he wore to his job. It is truly one of my most prized possessions, because, let's face it, ties this hideous aren't easy to find.

Sure, you can buy lots of gag ties that are intentionally horrid, but what makes this thing so awesome is that someone designed it in the 60's-70's as a serious tie for men to wear to business meetings, Bar Mitzvahs, whatever. And my grandfather paid good money for it and DID JUST THAT.

The day I found it in his closet, I knew I'd stumbled on something rare and worth keeping. Someday I'm sure one of my descendants will do the same.

The picture doesn't do the bright colors justice. The vibrant reds, oranges, pinks, yellows, golds, whites, and a few previously undescribed hues make a pattern so striking... It looks like Roy G. Biv threw up.

Also, it's so wide at the bottom that you could wear a midriff shirt and no one would notice.


Yes, I really did wear it to work. Be jealous.

22 comments:

  1. Family treasures. This is good stuff.

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  2. My father had that tie!

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  3. tie pattern for a couch ... so awful that one's eyes get seasick from following the bilious after-image of the pink ... on the other hand, it would go well with the 70s light olive, celery green, sunset orange, and burnt orange kitchen appliances (and, macrame air fern planters) my husband and I were showered with at our engagement party

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  4. My high school class advisor gloried in his hideous tie collection. They were a sight to behold.

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  5. My husband somehow 'inherited' a few ties from his uncle. Our son Jim, who worked for a large retail store, asked to borrow one to wear one day. That evening when he got home and took it off, he saw what he thought was a spot in the underside and was kind of mad at himself for spilling something on it. Jim turned the tie over and kind of pulled the fabric apart was amused to find a picture of a very sexy young lady without much clothing printed on the fabric lining. Needless to say, that tie is much treasured by my husband.

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  6. I must have really bad taste because I don't think it's that bad. I don't think I'd notice it one way or another. What is wrong with me?!

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  7. That tie is fabulously, gloriously, unapologetically hideous! You do know that you are allowed to dry clean it, don't you?

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  8. My father had a similar one, except it was in hues of seafoam and toothpaste green and shell pink. My mother HATED that tie, and he would wear it to church just to aggravate her :)

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  9. My ex husband had some really hideous ties. Even he would admit they were awful. A local men's clothing store was having a contest to see who could turn in the worst tie. I turned one of my ex's ties in and he won. He was furious with me.

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  10. I think it is Fabulous!! Especially for the winter holiday season!!

    {please note tongue firmly planted in cheek}

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  11. Gramps was temporarily possessed by a ghost with ghoulish ties, and it was passed along through the generations.

    The tie has a similar appearance to the second-time around of an ethnic goulasch recipe served at the Bavarian delicatessen where I worked as a dishwasher in the summer prior to pharmacy school.

    This was 'back in the day'. Microwave ovens had just been commercially available, and there was a loud and active discussion among the bakers, cooks, and deli owners about reheating the wiener schnitzel for latecomers arriving just before the restaurant closed for the day.

    Actually the goulasch was not too bad. It was an acquired taste, but it did taste the same whether fresh or reheated. (The dishwasher got a free meal out the deal for epicurean consults.)

    The Black Forest tortes were works of art, though. But, it was years before I could purge German polkas, and schmaltzy accordion schottische dance renditions from my brain.

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  12. That is hideous, but if you keep it long enough, it will come back in style.

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  13. There doesn't need to be too much other clothing for foil --to make a properly dignified statement. It should only be seen with something in the lightest single shade of a pastel lilac or bold ivory (like the tile in the background). Grungy blue jeans, simple sandals, and apple green stethoscope, of course.

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  14. I once took a job that required I wear a tie to meet "societal expectations" regarding work attire. I made it my mission to find the most hideous ties I could find.

    The boss walked in one morning and saw a pale neon green with orange polka dotted tie around my neck.

    He started patting me around my waist. When I asked what he was doing he said "Something that bright has to have a battery pack."

    After that it was a challenge to find something to make him cringe.

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  15. My dad had one like that, too.

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  16. Doc, there's something wrong with my eyes!

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  17. My husband used to wear a tie in a similar pattern, but bright blue and gold. It might still be around here somewhere.

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  18. Ha. A college friend had a wide, tan tie with a hand-painted collie head on it. He wore it to many "tie and jacket required" events.

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  19. My husband walked passed me, glanced at my monitor, and said "cool tie."

    ... then again, my husband has a collection of tacky ties of his own (metallic purple paisley prints are his favorite).

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So wadda you think?