Friday, August 29, 2014

Hawaiian memories

In 1989 my family was renting a condo in Kaanapali.

The one above us had a group of 4 college-aged women on vacation. We often heard them talking out on the balcony. They didn't bother us, we just noticed who the upstairs neighbors were.

Anyway, one day my Dad and I were sitting outside, and we heard 2 of them upstairs, talking about some postcards they were sending back home. Suddenly, there was a huge gust of wind. The newspaper Dad was reading blew over the edge, and we saw some papers from the girls above get scattered into the air. We both went inside.

A few minutes later I went out (I'd left my Diet Coke on the table) and discovered a postcard had blown onto our balcony. It featured a picture of a large, muscular, young Polynesian guy, wearing nothing but a strategically placed banana leaf. The reverse side had an address on it, but nothing else. Someone (we assume one of the girls) had obviously started writing the card when it blew away.

I went inside, and absently tossed it on the table. I figured I'd run it up to the girls later (hell, maybe I'd get to meet them). Dad picked it up, looked it over, and then told me to go down to the gift shop and buy a postcard stamp.

When I got back he'd already filled it out. He took it to the front desk, asked them to make a photocopy, then put the stamp on and tossed it in the outgoing mailbox.

Here it is.




For those of you who can't read Dad's handwriting, it says

Hi, everyone,

We are having a wonderful time and are glad you're not here. Yesterday we all went swimming at the beach. We had to leave early, though, because "you know who" was killed by a shark. But we won't let a little thing like that ruin our vacation.

This guy on the card came up to us waving his dong. But this is considered hospitality by the locals. After about 2 hours of it we told him to leave, though.

See you soon,

All of us

So, if in 1989 your last name was Gillin, Scott, Alperstein, or Glantz, and you lived at that address, OR if you were their friends who returned home and were shocked that someone had actually filled out and mailed your postcard...

Now you know. It was my Dad.

And I still think that was brilliant.

17 comments:

  1. Wow, Dr G. The apple really didn't fall far from the tree, did it? Your dad was hilarious and awesome.

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  2. Too funny.

    I googled the address and found this:

    THE COVENTRY GROUP (PHOENIX) INC.
    CALIFORNIA CORPORATION
    Address: 14651 Ventura Blvd, #350
    Sherman Oaks, CA 91403
    Address Types: Registered Agent
    Registered Agent: S Dell Scott
    Filing Date: August 04, 1987
    File Number: C1594195


    The Coventry Group (Phoenix) Inc.

    The Coventry Group (Phoenix) Inc. was a corporation registered in the state of California.

    It was a foreign corporation, meaning it was formed outside of California. In this case, it was formed in Arizona. It registered in California on August 04, 1987.

    The Coventry Group (Phoenix) Inc. has surrendered its right to do business in California.

    The Coventry Group (Phoenix) Inc. was a for-profit entity.

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  3. Googled more. You should contact them and send them a link to this blog.

    asfgslaw.com/history/

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  4. Your father is amazing!

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  5. Well, now we know you come by it naturally.

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  6. It is a law firm in the San Fernando Valley. "The Firm continued to practice under the name of Gillin, Scott, Alperstein, Glantz, Simon & Nielsen, A Law Corporation"

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  7. They have lawyers in the San Fernando Valley? Wow. Apparently it's just a great all-around area for screwing people.

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  8. Aww the ol' SFV is my hometown.

    I find it hilarious that the law firm was (and did!) receive that particukar postcard. Very professional.

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  9. Haaaaahhh. Too funny.

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  10. Didn't need Google to tell you that was a law firm in the SFV.
    It's on the prime lawyer and real estate strip on Ventura Blvd, about a mile or so from the HQ of the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers, the umbrella organization for Paramount, Warner Bros., Sony, Fox, Disney, and ABCNNBCBS, etc., and a couple of miles from Universal Studios, Warner Bros., CBS, NBC, and so on.

    While the story was screamingly funny, now I want to hear the other side of the story, from either the ladies or anyone at the firm in question who saw the card.

    I'm nearby-local, so if I get a wild hare, I may just try to track it down and keep you posted.

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  11. AMAZING. Your dad is hilarious!!!

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  12. That was wonderful. Your dad has an excellent sense of humor. I wish I could have seen the expression on the faces at the law firm when they received it - hope it wasn't an employee.

    The address was familiar, and sure enough - when I lived nearby about a decade after this, it was the Sherman Oaks Borders Books - and has since apparently become TJ Maxx.

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  13. That's awesome! I would have loved to see the looks on the recipients' faces.

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  14. A shark? Wow, some people can be so inconsiderate! Good for your Dad for taking things in stride.

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So wadda you think?