A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Friday, March 14, 2014
Thursday night phone message
"Hi, this is Austin, and I'm in the twin's class at Wingnut school. My Dad says he'll get me a new XBox game if I take a girl to the junior high dance, so can you please have Marie call me? Thank you."
What a creepy invitation. That makes me want to smack him. At least he's honest. Ooh, why doesn't hair-gel son put on a wig, dress up in a Goodwill cocktail dress, and meet loverboy at the door the night of the dance.
Marie should tell Austin's father that she will go to the dance with Austin if he gets her ____. That way everyone is happy. Kids get new stuff. Austin's dad fulfills whatever bizarre need he has by sending son to dance, and the Grumpys sleep easy knowing Austin's interest in Marie is solely based on his desire for new electronics. Perfect.
Points for honesty. I'm guessing mom is on the PTO dance committee, and has no girls going to this thing. To avoid humiliation for mom, dad is strong armies g this kid to go.
At least that message is better than *Marie is a sweet shortie, and I wanna play grope ass during the dance.*
Win. Win. Marie gets to go with a boy who is still more interested in gaming than boobs. Mom isn't in the shame pit, and kid gets a game.
As one who lives with avid, dedicated gamers, I can see this as a desperate parent plea for the boy to make non obsessed friends with kids while he still can. I'm almost willing to bet if the boy wanted to bring a boy it might not be as big a problem as the game thing.
I had a friend that the phone message reminds me of. He was never interested in anything but video games. He had one girlfriend, but I think it was just to see what it was like to have one. He's well into adulthood now, but he rarely goes outside or interacts with people except over online video games. Probably trying to avoid the same fate here.
The kid has no future in sales or politics but you have to admire his honesty.
ReplyDeleteIf she goes to the dance with him, does she get to play on the xbox?
ReplyDeleteReal flattering to Marie!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, though, it sounds like Austin isn't masculine enough for Dad. Poor kid!
Ah,it begins.
ReplyDeleteThis is the time when having access to Fukitol and other psychoactive drugs is useful
For you, not the young man.
I think marie should ask for a cut of the deal and then go to the dance.
ReplyDeleteIt makes one wonder why a father decided to bribe his son to take a girl to a junior high dance.
ReplyDeleteSo? Can Austin be trusted? Does he have the stamp of approval to take Marie to the dance? Our shall we break or the pitch forks?
ReplyDeleteOne day, this kid is going to have to explain to potential dates why his nickname is "Microsoft."
ReplyDeleteWhat a creepy invitation. That makes me want to smack him. At least he's honest. Ooh, why doesn't hair-gel son put on a wig, dress up in a Goodwill cocktail dress, and meet loverboy at the door the night of the dance.
ReplyDeleteEgad! That is what I think.
ReplyDeleteWell?
ReplyDeleteIs Marie going to be giving Austin a piece of her mind next time they meet at school?
ReplyDeleteSee? Gay conversion therapy DOES work!
ReplyDeleteShe should really hold out for a guy with a Wii.
ReplyDeleteMarie should tell Austin's father that she will go to the dance with Austin if he gets her ____. That way everyone is happy. Kids get new stuff. Austin's dad fulfills whatever bizarre need he has by sending son to dance, and the Grumpys sleep easy knowing Austin's interest in Marie is solely based on his desire for new electronics. Perfect.
ReplyDeletePoints for honesty. I'm guessing mom is on the PTO dance committee, and has no girls going to this thing. To avoid humiliation for mom, dad is strong armies g this kid to go.
ReplyDeleteAt least that message is better than *Marie is a sweet shortie, and I wanna play grope ass during the dance.*
Win. Win. Marie gets to go with a boy who is still more interested in gaming than boobs. Mom isn't in the shame pit, and kid gets a game.
WINNING!
*SkullCandy*
Um, how is this the _kid's_ fault? The _father_ is the adult with that idea.
ReplyDeleteAnd you don't know the motivation behind it. Maybe his kid is really shy and he's just trying to get him out of his shell.
I'm not going to express any opinions about anybody here. I just want to say I laughed at this till my lungs thought the jig was up.
ReplyDeleteAs one who lives with avid, dedicated gamers, I can see this as a desperate parent plea for the boy to make non obsessed friends with kids while he still can. I'm almost willing to bet if the boy wanted to bring a boy it might not be as big a problem as the game thing.
ReplyDeleteI had a friend that the phone message reminds me of. He was never interested in anything but video games. He had one girlfriend, but I think it was just to see what it was like to have one. He's well into adulthood now, but he rarely goes outside or interacts with people except over online video games. Probably trying to avoid the same fate here.
ReplyDelete