Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page."
Nurse Newbie: "Hi, I'm the nurse taking care of Mr. Harry Plegia, in room 842."
Dr. Grumpy: "What can I do for you?"
Nurse Newbie: "Well, there was a consult written for you to see the patient 3 days ago, and we never heard back from you. I was wondering if you'd even gotten it, and when you'd be by to see him?"
Dr. Grumpy: "Um... I did the consult 3 days ago. And I've been following him daily since then."
Nurse Newbie: "Really? Because there was a family member here about 2 hours ago, who was looking through the chart, and told me he wanted to get another MRI. I don't know how he got the chart. Anyway, I called the hospitalist, and he told me to run it by you."
Dr. Grumpy: "Two hours ago? That was me! I came over and told you I wanted to do another MRI, but the computer ordering system was down when I tried to put it in."
Nurse Newbie: "That was you? Not a family member?"
Dr. Grumpy: "Yes!"
(pause)
Nurse Newbie: "Doctor, you really should dress better."
Buuuuuuuuuuurn...
ReplyDeleteA few years back, when I was looking for professional employment, I used to earn a little extra by scrounging for redeemable bottles and cans along the road, and incidentally walking a few miles every day. I was never "dressed for success" when I went to redeem my slips. On several Saturday mornings, another man, dressed as casually as I was (dirty t-shirt, grass stained shorts, and beat up sneakers) was also turning in redemption slips. I heard the clerk say "Good morning, Dr. Diet Coke." He was a cardiac specialist at the local hospital, and he did this for fun.
ReplyDeleteWe talked a few times about the best places to scrounge(we had no overlapping areas), and one couldn't tell from his appearance that he was a highly regarded physician. In other words, please don't sweat it.
ROTFLMAO!!!
ReplyDeleteOh come on. I assume you, like any other decent neurologist walk around with a reflex hammer on your person at all times. Dead giveaway.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you need a bigger stethoscope.
ReplyDeleteMen's Wearhouse, You are going to like the way you look. I guarantee it.
ReplyDeleteSorry, I know that line has been used a quadrillion times on the internet in the last 2 weeks, but do give it some thought.
I'm just impressed that Nurse Newbie had the guts to tell you that, but maybe she had more room for courage since it was taking up some of the room normally reserved for common sense. "Bless her heart."
ReplyDeleteFFS, you're a doctor not a fashion model.
ReplyDeleteWear what you want. People are more efficient and can concentrate better when they're comfortable.
Anyone who says anything else can be told "MYOB". Except Mrs Grumpy, you can tell her I said you can roll your eyes and say, "Yes, dear."
(If you're going out on a date night with her, she has say on what you wear. If you're going to work, she might well remember that old saying about picking your battles and move on.)
This (probably horrible)o marriage advice brought to you by Bitter Old Spinster Moose.
I did NOT see that punchline coming.
ReplyDeleteYou have the BEST stories! I don't know where in the world those situations actually happen but I know they do since you put them to 'paper'. I miss Mrs. Grumpy school nurse posts though! I told everyone about the Epi Pen one.
ReplyDelete-thanks for sharing!
Neurologists don't walk around with a stethoscope. And their Queen Square hammer is in their pocket. The giveaway is a row of safety pins on a larger safety pin fastened to their shirt.
ReplyDeleteYou mean... you don't wear a white lab coat like your profile picture suggests?? Say it isn't so! lol
ReplyDeleteexplains why you passed for receptionist
ReplyDeleteor a name badge. Or white coat (scares pts to death) or stethoscope. Or have head nurse call you "Dr. Whatever" loudly in her presence.
ReplyDeleteYou need a clip-on tie to put on your t-shirt when you are rounding.
ReplyDelete"Hi Nurse, I"m Dr Grumpy" doesn't seem that difficult
ReplyDeleteAw, this is adorable and this sort of thing happens all the time. Kudos to you for not getting mad that she didn't realize you were following the pt and I'm assuming her comment about your dress was a joke. Nurse Newbie will learn in time that neuro and infectious disease docs rarely look like "doctors"....and they are usually awesome people.
ReplyDeleteDr bagpipes, is that you? I've had similar issues where I used to work with new nurses not realising that one of our Drs used to leave his script pad in our drugs of addiction cupboard so he could run the 7km each way to visit his patients and not have to bring anything.
ReplyDeleteWe have this issue. Suburban ED and we have three docs that look like they are 14. Several more wear scrub tops and old jeans, one doesn't even bother with anything remotely medical, favoring spandex shorts and Under Armor shirt. Our PA was wearing pajama bottoms or Zubaz or some shit last night.
ReplyDeleteI'm continually surprised because we are constantly getting nasty grams on every other issue under the sun, but when the docs look like homeless, nothing. And yes, we have a dress code, which specifies scrubs of any color.
Possibly the nurse needs a neuro consult if she's taking orders from 'family members' regarding medical treatment. Although, you probably should dress better doc. :D
ReplyDeletetcvnurse