My former call partner, Dr. Darth, had an office manager (Suzee). He eventually fired her and promoted his secretary (Floozee, who he was banging on the side) to office manager.
So when Suzee needed to see a neurologist a few months later, she made an appointment with me.
Unfortunately, she came in on a week when Dr. Darth was out of town, and I was covering for him.
So as Suzee sat in my lobby, leafing through "So You're Trapped in a Doctor's Waiting Room" magazine, Floozee came in with a bunch of MRI reports for me to review in Dr. Darth's absence.
The magazine and MRI reports were quickly forgotten.
They both had pepper spray. Mary had to call hospital security to get them out before anyone got hurt.
They both had pepper spray where? She had it on her hands and it got on the magazines and files? She sprayed them?
ReplyDeleteWhat am I missing? I swear I read English.
They were threatening each other with it, but neither had fired by the time security arrived. I have no idea what happened in the parking lot.
ReplyDeletePepper spray is nasty stuff, to carry it in the Coast Guard part of your training is to get sprayed with it-directly in the face. I have never seen so much snot come out of a human as I did that day.
ReplyDeleteThe oozy sisters obviously had never been sprayed with the stuff or they never would have even threatened. Works great on bears though.
You certainly have an interesting life.
ReplyDeleteDid Floozie ultimately become the new Mrs. Darth ? And thereafter keep the Darth on a very short leash. Have to know, cause I just love when the cheating scumbag gets hoisted by his own petard.
ReplyDeleteLocally, we hikers were told to eschew a type of bear spray that was being peddled as it turned out that the stuff was the equivalent of Buffalo Wings for Bears, hot and spicy but irresistable.
What is it with some docs? You have no idea how many times I have seen the former cocktail-waitress-banging-the-doc promoted to his (always a him) secretary/ receptionist/ in-office surgical assistant. These guys have no sense of professional boundaries, or much of anything else.
ReplyDeleteThe doctor lifestyle is very limited. There is minimal social interaction. Docs and nurses frequently hook up. I actually totally get it. And if you're married to a doctor because you were young and stupid, and realize that twenty ears later, you STILL haven't had much time together, you finally realize that it's a shitty lifestyle. And get a hot secretary. Who totally thinks you're awesome because you're a doctor. Unlike your wife, who is unimpressed, because she is also a doctor/nurse/unit manager/tech. And neither person is emotionally available to each other. And then you find someone who IS emotionally available.
DeleteI say all this as a female physician. I actually get it. I've been in awkward situations for the same reason. It's easy to judge, but if you found yourself in the same spot, you might understand. I actually thought carefully about my choice of partner (and got very lucky) and we make sure that we actually talk and spend time together. If I were unavailable to him emotionally, and showed no interest in his life and work, I really couldn't blame him for finding a secretary on the side.
Packer, if the doc had kept his petard in his pants none of this would have happened.
ReplyDeletePacker, bear spray works
ReplyDeletejust buy the kind of (looks like small fire extinguisher) version rangers use at Yellowstone.
also works on those pesky dogs who want to bite during neighborhood j9jogs, and can reach substantial distance, which you really want for bear-range.
dont think the range is sufficient for FLoozies , though. bet she is at least wife / version 3.0
wahhahha robot sign on ying...
Pepper spray is not funny, so speaks the former student journalist covering a campus disturbance. (ah, memories . . . )
ReplyDeleteI know the concern w/ bears -- if you don't use the right stuff, they do think you are chipolte-flavored human! Best to move away quickly and quietly, and if you can't get away, curl up and play dead.
UNFORTUNATELY, Dr. Darth (or Dr. Dickhead) did not have super glue on his zipper.
I'm back, baby! I'm back!
ReplyDelete"leafing through "So You're Trapped in a Doctor's Waiting Room" magazine."
ReplyDeleteAnd they are 2 years old with pages torn out. ;-)
Fox's next hit reality show: "When Office Managers Attack!"
ReplyDeleteIs this a true story???
ReplyDeleteYes.
ReplyDeleteI think it's yummy!:) What a lively waiting room!:) Mine was a drag in comparison...
ReplyDelete