Friday, February 8, 2013

Guest post: God and smoking

I'm tired, uninspired, and swamped today, so I'm putting up this story sent in by Brent.


Dr. Brent: "You know Mr. Nightshade, smoking isn't good for you.  It causes all kinds of health problems and it's expensive.  You really should try to stop smoking."

Mr. Nightshade: "Yeah, I know."


Next visit, a few months later.


Dr. Brent: "So Mr. Nightshade, how are you doing with smoking?"

Mr. Nightshade: "I quit."

Dr. rent: (rather shocked and dumbfounded) "Wow! That's great! What finally made you decide to stop smoking?"

Mr. Nightshade: "God told me to stop smoking."

Dr Brent: "Err, that's wonderful that you stopped smoking."


Next visit a few months later:


Dr. Brent: "So, Mr. Nightshade, how are you doing?"

Mr. Nightshade: "I'm fine, but I'm smoking again."

Dr. Brent: "Oh, why's that?"

Mr.Nightshade: "God told me to stop smoking, so I stopped smoking. But the more I thought about it, the madder I got. I like to smoke, so why should God tell me to stop smoking?  It made me really mad. I wasn't going to let God tell me what I can and can't do, so I started smoking again and I told him to be quiet."
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15 comments:

  1. skidmarkFebruary 8, 2013 at 5:44 AM

    Dr. Brent found my long-lost grandmother? I'd be sure of it if she had brought him some fresh-baked strudel made with apples, rasins, and enough butter to clog the major arteies of at least 10 cities.

    stay safe.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousFebruary 8, 2013 at 8:26 AM

    Psych consult?

    ReplyDelete
  3. PackerFebruary 8, 2013 at 9:17 AM

    God gives us that free will bug a boo and expects us to be smart enough or mature enough or savy enough or educable enough to use it properly. Then he goes quiet and then we really mess things up.Smoke em if you got em.

    Hey Eve, I am kind of hungry hand me one of those apples.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousFebruary 8, 2013 at 9:30 AM

    Is this a true story? I know Dr. Grump's stories are true but not sure about Dr Brent's...

    ReplyDelete
  5. bunkywiseFebruary 8, 2013 at 10:47 AM

    The ad alongside of this post is for drug detox and alcohol detox. I wonder if it is a message from God? "Honest, God, I only have one drink a day and sometimes NONE(unless it the weekend and there is a party at a rich friend's house and they have out the good stuff...) You can understand how I might have two or three under those circumstances, right, God?"

    ReplyDelete
  6. BrentFebruary 8, 2013 at 10:53 AM

    It's a true story; and yes, the patient has schizophrenia.

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousFebruary 8, 2013 at 1:20 PM

    Mr. Nighshade,
    can you promise me you will never ask God about handguns?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Wayne LaPierreFebruary 8, 2013 at 1:49 PM

    Mr. Nightshade has every right in the world to ask God about handguns, and own as many firearms, like a Bushmaster XM15-E2S, as he so desires. And if he uses them to massacre a crowd of innocent adults and children, that's a small price to pay for freedom. And isn't freedom what America is all about?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Steeny LouFebruary 8, 2013 at 4:18 PM

    Hey Dr. Grumpy,

    Sorry you're feeling tired, uninspired, and swamped. :(

    (((HUGS)))

    ReplyDelete
  10. Grumpy, M.D.February 8, 2013 at 4:31 PM

    Thank you, Steeny. With as many kids as you have, I shouldn't be whining.

    Crap. And now the snow has started.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Steeny LouFebruary 8, 2013 at 5:13 PM

    Dr. Grumpy, we all have our cups of trouble. If yours is full, it's full, no matter what the ingredients are.

    Then dump snow into the cup?

    Frozen trouble.

    I know how that goes, living in a part of Canada where winter can be merciless.

    ReplyDelete
  12. CharlesFebruary 8, 2013 at 5:49 PM

    With that attitude he is lucky that God doesn't "smoke" him with a few bolts of lightning.

    ReplyDelete
  13. AnonymousFebruary 9, 2013 at 10:15 AM

    "Brent said...

    It's a true story; and yes, the patient has schizophrenia.

    February 8, 2013 at 10:53 AM"

    ----------------------------------

    Ah!! That explains!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. PinskylicksteinMarch 11, 2013 at 12:59 PM

    Whenever you smoke, smoke to the glory of God." Probably, on the merit of only these two scripture passages you will agree cigarette smoking is not compatible.

    ReplyDelete
  15. DrglicksmanMarch 15, 2013 at 11:56 PM

    Whenever you smoke, smoke to the glory of God." Probably, on the merit of only these two scripture passages you will agree cigarette smoking is not compatible.

    ReplyDelete

So wadda you think?