A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
This is my practice
The following is, verbatim, an email that Mary sent me this morning. It speaks for itself.
"Your 11:00 just called. The maintenance people at her apartment building painted her door shut, and she can't get out. She'll call back to reschedule."
@D. Ahhh, I hadn't considered that she was having trouble finding the door... er because those malicious maintenance people had snuck in and painted over everything of course. I was leaning more towards B at first but now I change my vote to D. I hope the poor woman makes it to your office Dr. G.
Once when I was on call and (briefly) sleeping in my call room, I was trapped inside by a hastily erected construction barrier. They literally sealed off the door to the room at like 3AM. Boy was I confused when I blearily arose at 5AM, pulled my door open, and found a inpenitrable wall of a plastic wrap-like material where the doorway should be.
Presumably it happened at night while she was asleep and therefore the door was opened at any point. Plenty of time to dry. Paint really can stick things pretty hard, it's not that strong but it gets a lot of contact area.
I guess they forgot / were being sloppy and didn't use painters tape right, or the paint dripped in anyway.
My MIL called the police and said that maintenance had locked her in. The police came and took her to the local hospital telling her that they had to be sure that she was not injured in her attempt to get out. From there she went directly to an altizmer's unit at a local nursing home. (where she had needed to be for some time but the sibling with medical power of attorney could not accept)
I can totally picture this happening. Some of the paint jobs I've seen could have gummed up the deadbolt too. So my guess is she really needs a neurologist or it is true.
I came home one day to our rental townhouse and the door wouldn't open. I managed to break in through a back window (since I didn't have key for the back deadbolt - we never used that door), and checked the front locks. They were working fine. I ended up taking the door off it's hinges and kicking it free. The paint, although quite old, had decided that that day it was time to meld with the rubber weather-stripping gasket around the door. Thankfully, I was coming home, and didn't have to be any place. I'm not sure how I would have felt if I was leaving and had to be someplace. I didn't like leaving the back door unlocked and I didn't have any working keys for it.
Hmmm...
ReplyDeleteA. extremely fast-drying thick coat of paint (plausible but improbable)
B. she is pushing outward on a door that needs to be pulled inward (my favorite Farside cartoon ever)
C. She forgot to unlock the deadbolt
What's your diagnosis Dr.?
I know you're a neurologist so it's probable that you might have a few patients with...er...problems.
ReplyDeleteBut I am beginning to doubt you, Ibee. No one could have this many idiots/liars/deranged people as patients.
D. They painted the inside of the door, including the deadbolt and the knob.
ReplyDeleteWouldn't surprise me at all.
@D. Ahhh, I hadn't considered that she was having trouble finding the door... er because those malicious maintenance people had snuck in and painted over everything of course. I was leaning more towards B at first but now I change my vote to D. I hope the poor woman makes it to your office Dr. G.
ReplyDeleteSome of the paint got between the door and the frame and is sticking it shut.
ReplyDeleteOnce when I was on call and (briefly) sleeping in my call room, I was trapped inside by a hastily erected construction barrier. They literally sealed off the door to the room at like 3AM. Boy was I confused when I blearily arose at 5AM, pulled my door open, and found a inpenitrable wall of a plastic wrap-like material where the doorway should be.
ReplyDeletePresumably it happened at night while she was asleep and therefore the door was opened at any point. Plenty of time to dry. Paint really can stick things pretty hard, it's not that strong but it gets a lot of contact area.
ReplyDeleteI guess they forgot / were being sloppy and didn't use painters tape right, or the paint dripped in anyway.
I have to give her the benefit of the doubt. If her apartment maintenance is anything like mine, this is very possible.
ReplyDeleteMy MIL called the police and said that maintenance had locked her in. The police came and took her to the local hospital telling her that they had to be sure that she was not injured in her attempt to get out. From there she went directly to an altizmer's unit at a local nursing home. (where she had needed to be for some time but the sibling with medical power of attorney could not accept)
ReplyDeleteI can totally picture this happening. Some of the paint jobs I've seen could have gummed up the deadbolt too.
ReplyDeleteSo my guess is she really needs a neurologist or it is true.
I came home one day to our rental townhouse and the door wouldn't open. I managed to break in through a back window (since I didn't have key for the back deadbolt - we never used that door), and checked the front locks. They were working fine. I ended up taking the door off it's hinges and kicking it free. The paint, although quite old, had decided that that day it was time to meld with the rubber weather-stripping gasket around the door.
ReplyDeleteThankfully, I was coming home, and didn't have to be any place. I'm not sure how I would have felt if I was leaving and had to be someplace. I didn't like leaving the back door unlocked and I didn't have any working keys for it.