Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page."
Mrs. Franklin: "Hi, you see me for nerve damage in my foot, and I'm on Neurontin."
Dr. Grumpy: "Yes. What's up?"
Mrs. Franklin: "Well, lightning struck my apartment complex an hour ago, and started a small fire in the laundry room. The fire department put it out, and everything is okay now."
Dr. Grumpy: "Are you okay? Was your medication lost?"
Mrs. Franklin: "Oh, everything is fine."
Dr. Grumpy: "Why are you calling?"
Mrs. Franklin: "I just figured this is the sort of thing my doctors should know."
Or how to know that you are asking far to many questions of your patients, for they get the idea that you want to know everything.
ReplyDeleteAll the commentators shot their bolt in the vaccination firestorm Grumpy started last week.
Reminds me of the voicemail I got from Mrs. Noduh: Hi, I'm just calling to let you know that my cat is still dead and there has been no change in his condition overnight.
ReplyDeleteWas any laundry burned up? If so, will you be clothes shopping? Don't forget to take your Neurontin in the excitement at the mall. Better buy some jewelry to calm your nerves.
ReplyDeleteTo be entirely fair, smoke inhalation from domestic fires can cause (central) neurological problems, since the smoke often contains CO, HCN etc.
ReplyDeleteDid you ask how his Aunt Ethel's doing these days?
ReplyDeleteHow considerate of this patient to make sure her doctor is up to date on the goings on in her life! ::sarcastic voice::
ReplyDeleteShe is obviously a lightning rod and you should fire her immediately, for the safety of your staff.
ReplyDeleteSecurity word: eyotiest. Eyoty, eyotier, eyotiest!