Due to an insane amount amount of kid activities today, I'm just putting up this post from 2009.
Before Viagra and it's cousins, there were other methods of waking Sheriff Woody. They're still out there, for those who have issues with Viagra.
One of them is Caverject (or Alprostadil for my pharmacy fans). This is fairly effective at getting it up for special occasions. They have to be pretty special, though, because Caverject has to be injected directly into your winkie to work. What fun.
Because it came to market before the era of direct-to-consumer celebrity advertising, we were fortunately spared TV ads featuring Eric Clapton singing (to the tune of "Cocaine"):
"If your lady is hot
Just give yourself a shot-
Caverject."
But I digress.
I have a patient who's been using Caverject for years. For whatever reason he can't use one of the newer drugs. He's kind of an aging, swinging, disco guy. In the 70's he was swinging, single, wearing gold chains, and picking up babes at the disco. In 2009 he's still swinging, still single, still wearing chains, and now picking up aging babes at the disco.
A few weeks ago he had a small stroke (he's fine now), and as a result he's now on Coumadin, a potent blood thinner. This gives new meaning to "Stayin' Alive".
So last Saturday he was out getting his boogie on and picked up Ms. Agingdiscoqueen. They went back to his place for some wild times. He shot himself up with Caverject and the fun began.
And abruptly ended. Apparently she got on top, and while she was riding the disco pony, blood began squirting out the side where he injected Caverject (thanks to Coumadin). Seeing blood flying all over those areas killed the mood fast. She ran out, and likely went home to douche with bleach.
He's been visiting me and his cardiologist today, to discuss stopping Coumadin.
Thus endeth the 70's.
Some of the decisions that people make while on Coumadin... Some days it pisses me off that we've all but legislated Darwinism out of existence here in America.
ReplyDeleteOooo. Just, oooo. Poor dude.
ReplyDeleteI love how the obvious solution is stopping Coumadin. xD
ReplyDeleteI had a friend who did some consulting for Pharmacia the year after Viagra came out (Pharmacia made Caverject). He told me that the guy in charge of marketing Caverject had said the following about Viagra:
ReplyDeleteSure, Viagra will get you hard, but if you want a real diamond cutter, you have to go with Caverject.
I cannot make these things up.
Aw. Poor guy.
ReplyDeleteWas this a foreseeable consequence to using coumadin along with Caverject?
ReplyDeleteobviously not wearing a condom! another throw back to the 70's. can he use Muse instead?
ReplyDeleteMy mind still boggles at an adult, a parent, and a medical doctor who refers to a penis as a "winkie."
ReplyDeleteI strongly suggest you never try reading the book, "Winkie," by Clifford Chase. It's very weird and will probably break your brain (further).
Something about seeing lots of adverse consequences to anti-coagulation (I mean, you work in a hospital system, you're not going to see all the folks who cope just fine with it) makes me and a lot of my RN friends kind of leery... This consequence brings, ummmm, added color to the "burden vs benefit" conversation.
ReplyDeletethanks for the great belly laugh!!!
ReplyDeleteDisco boy, that's the way it goes, so wipe your nose, and
ReplyDeleteTry it again, to get a little lay tomorrow.
Disco boy, no one understands, but thank the lord that you
Still got hands, to help you do that jerkin that'll
Blot out your disco sorrow.
Ewwwww, yuck.
ReplyDeleteDo a little dance,
ReplyDeleteMake a little love,
Bleed out tonight...
kk pac
The timing of this post is so funny, because I just got finished reading "Michael Tolliver Lives" by Armistead Maupin, and the main character actually has to do this. I thought it was fiction, but apparently not!
ReplyDeleteWorst date ever !!!
ReplyDeleteI don't ever want to be on Coumadin. I've seen the patients coming in to get their protime check...don't wanna look like that ;)
ReplyDeleteHad a patient on Caverject and always told me he was glad he had no sensation or he'd never have used it.
ReplyDeleteIt does use a thin gauge needle, though (29 I believe).
Muse can be used, however, some folks don't think it works as well and it can be difficult if you have coordination problems.
If you only saw how much Levitra, alprostadil, etc., we hand out at the Hotel....your tax dollars at work.
What always ticks me off is how many insurance plans will cover a huge range of ED meds, but won't cover birth control. Also, if my breasts start to sag, they won't pay to perk them back up. Where's the fairness in that?
ReplyDelete