Friday, January 7, 2011

Parenthood

Is when you wake up at 2:00 a.m., and realize you forgot to put money from the tooth fairy under your kid's pillow.

And you left your wallet out in your car.

So you find yourself barefoot, wearing only boxer shorts, in an unheated garage (28°F/-2°C) in the middle of winter.

And, because your wallet has slipped under the car seat, you have to kneel on the freezing concrete to try to reach around and find it.

It's hard to fall back asleep after that.

47 comments:

  1. I thought the Tooth Fairy took the tooth and left money. Next time tell the kid he was busy bailing out California.

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  2. You left out the part where you look in your wallet and find nothing but a twenty.

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  3. Or assembling hideously complex train sets at 3 am...

    Barb

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  4. well, you could always take money from Mrs Grumpy's wallet instead.

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  5. It's in her car. And she only had a $20. I at least had some quarters.

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  6. The tooth fairy stopped coming for me after the first 2 teeth =P I played the role for my younger brother a few times because my mum works late nights.

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  7. What a good story! And a good daddy!

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  8. At least you didn't also have to go to a bank machine, and then to a convinience store in the middle of the night to buy something...and then back again cause you realized the change you got wouldn't work out right, LOL.
    The TF is very negligent in our house. Thankfully, our kids tend to lose or swallow their teeth, LOL.

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  9. Told my kid TTF works weekdays ONLY. No weekends and public holidays for her... This works only if you forgot 'the job' on non-weekdays... ;-)

    Sue

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  10. You are so right. BTDT.

    The subject of who owns this chore is a sure fire way to implode the peace around here.

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  11. You're lucky, our daughter had a extra permanent tooth and had to have it removed. That involved removing her top two baby teeth to get at it. After sewing her up and putting pressure on the wound, another baby tooth on the bottom fell out. The tooth fairy was major broke after paying for 4 teeth (the tooth fairy took the rogue tooth too).

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  12. At least going out to your car didn't involve a flashlight and boots. And insulated coveralls, a parka and a snow blower.

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  13. See, in our house sometimes the tooth fairy's money "falls" behind their beds. Then their mother, who is brilliant (and has good sleight-of-hand skills) magically finds it tucked into a corner somewhere.

    Talent. I haz it.

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  14. Peice of cake, wait until the phone call awakens you at 2 AM, Hi Mr. X, Local PD calling can you come down and pick up your son, seems like he and a few of his buddies decided to sneak out and see what life is like at 2 AM.

    Try sleeping after that.

    Little kids little problems---big kids---------

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  15. ...similar experience here but I stumbled around in the dark and left 3 quarters and 1 batting cage token under the pillow. Needless to say the cover was blown.

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  16. That's why I keep dollar coins in my jewelry box. Needed one last night, as a matter of fact...

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  17. Well, good to know that some things are the same all over the world...

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  18. Tell them to Tooth Fairy was sick and had to call the understudy who leaves quarters under the cereal bowl.

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  19. The toothfairy finds it difficult to fly when it is raining, cold or sometimes even dark. I was sad when Santa Claus was a story, rejoiced when they figured out the tooth fairy.

    I saved their teeth in my jewelry box. Was cleaning the other day and found them, what was I thinking? Gross!!! Seemed like a crime to throw them away at the time, thank god for the distance of year.

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  20. You leave your wallets in your cars??!! That doesn't sound safe.

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  21. Our tooth fairy sometimes sends a text message to the kid apologizing for being late (due to an unexpected tooth loss volume in the west) but promising to come the next day...

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  22. My 6 year old has decided he likes his baby teeth more than he wants the money! It's really hilarious!

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  23. You're a good parent/tooth fairy Dr G! I don't have a garage, good thing I don't have kids!

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  24. I keep baby teeth for DNA purposes. When questioned about my possession of same I told the kids that the tooth fairy left them in a box for me after taking them from under the pillow. Fortunately for me I save certain types of quarters and have been able to use them in a pinch. Then I exclaim over them in the morning and ask said child, "HEY! That is so not fair! The tooth fairy never left me stuff like that. Would you be willing to trade 'x' for those?"

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  25. You did the right thing! The frozen knee fairy should come and give you a backrub in return (or knee warmers).

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  26. @Amanda: Genius. Why did I not think of that yet?

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  27. once I forgot completely, and my daughter cried from the bed the next morning that the tooth fairy didn't leave her any money. I told my husband to quickly give me some change from the nightstand, and just as she came running in our room, I shoved my hand under my pillow and said 'hey, look! she left it here under my pillow instead! She must have been drunk! That crazy tooth fairy!' (I was half asleep still). She actually believed that the tooth fairy had got drunk and left the money under the wrong pillow.

    One of my worst parenting moments.

    Tammy

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  28. @Amanda - I've had to do that one a time or two. I've got two boys losing teeth right now (my oldest is losing his late) I've also given up on the under the pillow thing because I have light sleepers. We leave teeth on the kitchen counter in a baggie so that the tooth fairy can find them easily. That way I can grab a handful of coins out of the junk drawer, chuck them in the bag, and voila!

    We also have a potty fairy that comes once the kids make the final transition from kid potty to adult potty and don't need the kid potty any more. The Potty Fairy brings toys, not money.

    Now that I think about it, my kids are extortionists. Between Santa, the tooth fairy and the potty fairy, we're always broke.

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  29. Aaawww, toot(h) sweet!

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  30. @ Amanda & I Said - very good ideas! Last tooth our daughter got $10 (no change!!) but with a very small note, saying she'd given her extra for Christmas. (it was a few days before). I didn't want to have to cough up $10 per tooth in the future!

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  31. Also, I'm with the others who point out the dangers of leaving wallet/purse in the car...of any place in your home, garage is the most likely to be robbed. I wouldn't care about the cash so much...I would have nightmares about replacing the license, cards, etc.

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  32. Awwww bless :) That shows true love. Or maybe just a desire to avoid a tear tantrum first thing in the morning...

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  33. i hope skool nurse knew a cure for insomnia.

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  34. then there are those times, you don't remember until 7am as the little ones wake up .... which is what normally happens to me, so either i have very innocent kids (ooh, they must have been busy last night and will come tonight), or they just humour me.

    I suspect the latter.

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  35. You are a good dad. By the time my second lost a couple, I could never remember so I gave up and told. I blamed my inability to remember on the meds my neurologist has me on.

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  36. I forgot one time and had to suffer through the crushed face etc. I got a friend of mine to write a note of apology from the TF stating she was sorry and gave the boy an extra buck.

    The guilt of parenthood...

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  37. "The Tooth Fairy was drunk." OMG - I love it! But how did you pull that one off with a straight face? I'm still lauging! :)

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  38. Grumpy:

    Our dentist told us some crazy parents were paying $25 per tooth.

    I prepped my kid by telling him that $1 per tooth (I like the coin idea) is the going rate in our neck of the woods (i.e. with our tooth fairy).

    May not be the same as your friends, but ours is $1, pal.

    So far, no more questions.

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  39. Our first-ever tooth lost garnered a $20 because the tooth fairy's wallet had only that bill in it....

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  40. Overheard one of our kids telling a friend, "we have the laziest tooth fairy ever. Sometimes it takes three days to get anything."

    Ungrateful brat.

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  41. A similar thing happened to me one Christmas Eve. I went out into the garage in nothing but my PJs and ended up locking myself out of the house. It was below freezing that night and probably only in the 20s in the garage. I did everything to try to wake up my husband...blew the car horn, put the garage door up and down, anything to make noise. NO response. I found some old clothes in a box and put several layers on to keep from freezing to death. My final solution: I cut the main breaker off. My husband uses a CPAP machine. That woke him up in a hurry!!!

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  42. At least you don't have to park your car on the street. And you don't sleep in the nude...

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  43. Love hearing stories like this. I'm gonna be a dad soon!

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  44. Should have just gotten a 'Silver Dollar' out from ye ole collect, put that under their pillow and when they hop around going yippie, you can say: Oh, you are special... let me save this for when you grow up and will be worth more! Kid: Yippie! I'm special to the tooth fairy!

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  45. I'm so glad to hear that TF around the world are slackers! I have also employed the sleight of hand technique,been forced to hand out$20 and have also had to blame the dog or cat sleeping on the bed for nonpayment (TFs are afraid of dogs and cats didn't you know!)

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So wadda you think?