Friday, January 28, 2011

Mary's desk, January 28, 2011

Guy comes in and stands at front desk.


Mary: "Can I help you?"

Mr. Dick: "Yeah. I'm a new patient, and I need to see Dr. Grumpy."

Mary: "Okay, let me get the schedule... What's your insurance?"

Mr. Dick: "You don't take my insurance. It's National Illness, Inc."

Mary: "No, we don't take that one."

Mr. Dick: "I know! You told me that last week when I called!"

Mary: "Okay, so what can I do for you?"

Mr. Dick: "Not a damn thing! I just came by to tell you that it really pisses me off that you don't take my insurance!"

Mary: "I'm sorry, sir, I..."

Mr. Dick: "And your cash price for an appointment is way too high! You people are absolutely unreasonable!"

Mary: "Sir, your insurance's website has names of neurologists who take your insurance."

Mr. Dick: "I already found one that does! Believe me! I just wanted to come by and tell you what a lousy practice you have!"

Walks out.

42 comments:

  1. Well, guess what, Mr. Dick? Your INSURANCE sucks. SO THERE.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have a question. Why do doctors charge so much if a patient wants to pay cash? Why do doctors charge/accept less from insurance companies?

    ReplyDelete
  3. You should probably let Mary drink on the clock.

    ReplyDelete
  4. You should charge people if they wish to have consultations with Mary.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I know your a big history buff and this question is not related at all to the post but where were you 25 years ago today. I remember this day like it was yesterday. I was a Junior in HS and I was sitting in math class (second seat in the last row closest to the window). The TV's in the classroom popped on and we watched it during math class. Crazy! I think why I remember is because many years later I taught with someone who trained for that mission and for whatever reason he had to back out at the last minute. Otherwise, he would have been on the Challenger. I wish I know why he backed out just about six weeks before the travel date. Wow!

    Sorry to take this post off topic. All I have to saw that Mr. Dick was too kind.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Viral marketing at its finest.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I don't care what you're paying her; Mary needs a raise.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Mary ~ praying ~

    "Thank the universe we don't take his insurance, thank the universe we don't..."

    ReplyDelete
  9. Another bullet dodged on your parts.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Some people have way too much time on their hands...

    ReplyDelete
  11. The whackos come marching in one by
    one..hurrah(?) hurrah..the whackos
    come marching im..nlah blah blah.

    First one leaves because you knew the other doctor that patient fired, now insurance! UGH

    Mary needs to be given a raise and
    happy hour! Also a big bonus per
    crazy person!

    WV: Oh FRAVIT to hell

    ReplyDelete
  12. He later stormed over to Dr. Pissy's office to repeat the charade...

    ReplyDelete
  13. This guy must have come straight to my pharmacy!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. "By the way, can you validate my parking?"

    ReplyDelete
  15. He's probably received a stupendous bill for emergency care from a specialist whose office statement reads "We will not bill your insurance". (Primarily since our billing service is too lazy/stupid or couldn't find the carrier on the internet.)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Is he related to Mrs. Evil? This seems to be a theme this week.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Definitely give Mary a raise . . . and buy that lady a bottle of the good stuff!

    ReplyDelete
  18. "That was a 'neg,' so now, according to the principles of 'The Game,' you're supposed to fall in love with me."

    ReplyDelete
  19. Maybe this is why they say not to buy insurance from blackjack dealers.

    ReplyDelete
  20. "It's nothing personal, but according to the terms of my insurance, I have to come here and do this in order to have them pay for the other neurologist."

    ReplyDelete
  21. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to catch my flight back home to Mauritius."

    ReplyDelete
  22. "But as long as I'm here, would any of you like to buy one of these coupon books?"

    ReplyDelete
  23. "In fact, you're so fucking lame that when I asked my new neurologist if he knew you and he said yes, I walked right the fuck out of there! Ha!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  24. Is it wrong to hope that this insurance company is the Scumbag Insurance you referred to in Twitter?
    Speaking seriously, are any of the crazy people you seem to attract suffering from actual neurological disorders that cause their craziness?

    ReplyDelete
  25. In a way, it's kinda sorta likea backhanded compliment. At least the patient wanted to see Dr. Grumpy, if not for his practice and the way the insurance handles the payments for docs not on the list. It's not like the patient just simply didn't want to see Dr. Grumpy. Apparently, he did want to see Dr. Grumpy. And, I'm betting that if he could afford the cost of the visit, he still would want to see Dr. Grumpy. Now, the question is, what if he won the lottery, would Dr. Grumpy want to see him.

    It sounds like the patient was PO'd that the outfit he works for is too cheap to pay for the care he wants to receive. Maybe, the patient should just quit his job and go on welfare, since Dr. Grumpy takes Medicaid?

    ReplyDelete
  26. Some people are in serious need of perspective and a life!! Poor Mary.

    ReplyDelete
  27. To #1 Anonymous - Doctors have to charge the uninsured what they bill insurance companies (even though the insurance companies don't pay them that amount), otherwise, it's considered insurance fraud. It's an insane system (anyone correct me if I'm wrong). Hospitals usually accept a certain number of uninsured patients that they can pay for because their orthopedic practices don't take anything but cash or your first born.

    ReplyDelete
  28. once again- dndoda. oh, and 1439- i was calling in a patient in a busy outpatient clinic where the tube was on and saw the launch and the end.

    ReplyDelete
  29. SR- WWhy would I want someone else's first born? I have enough trouble with the one I already have!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Anon #1 - How much do you think a physician should charge for their services? Isn't it only fair that someone with at least 12 years of medical training (and may hold your life in their hands) should be compensated accordingly?

    ReplyDelete
  31. forget about getting Mary liquor; just get a metal detector.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Jules, the original anon poster didn't suggest that the doctor shouldn't be compensated fairly.

    They asked why the individual should have to pay a higher price than the insurance company pays for the same service.

    Tracy2

    ReplyDelete
  33. Tracy2,

    "Why do doctors charge so much if a patient wants to pay cash?"

    ReplyDelete
  34. If Mary keeps getting crazy people coming up to her at her desk, you're going to have to add in PTSD treatment as part of her benefits package. Can you imagine telling a new hire about the benefits "Well, you get a 401k, health insurance, any neuro visits are free, of course. And oh yeah, we cover any visits to the psychologist due to PTSD you will be getting because of patient behavior. Here's your parking pass!"

    ReplyDelete
  35. Mary deserves a huge raise, a kick-ass taser and her own blog. Dr. G...make it happen!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Jules, but the first question was in association with the 2nd question: "Why do doctors charge/accept less from insurance companies?" Reading the passage as a whole, ANON #1 really wanted to know why the big insurance companies get a price break when the cash customer does not.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Too bad. He sounds like a wonderful patient.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I actually find this kind of behavior frightening. Anyone willing to make a special trip to your office to confront you like this is displaying agressive and unstable behavior. Recently, one of our pharmacists (at another location) refused to fill a guy's methadone 2 weeks too soon. He threatened the usuall BS and left. A few hours later he came back to the store with a fully loaded AK-47 and several clips of extra ammo. He had every intention of killing anyone in the store. Luckily, the guy's girlfriend called the police while he was on his way and he was apprehended in the parking lot. It's a stark reminder of how desperate some people are and to what lengths they will go. We never know just what will set them off. By the way, this was in small-town America not inner-city getto, so location isn't a factor.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Apparently Jules has reading comprehension issues.

    ReplyDelete

So wadda you think?