Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page."
Mr. Phone: "Hi, I had an appointment with you last month, and I need to come in again."
Dr. Grumpy: "Okay, my office is closed today. Can I have Mary call you on Monday?"
Mr. Phone: "No, I need to see you today."
Dr. Grumpy: "Well, the office is closed, but you've got me on the phone. What can I do for you?"
Mr. Phone: "Yeah, but on the phone, how do I know it's you? I mean, you could be a phone operator or something. I really want to talk to the doctor."
Dr. Grumpy: "Sir, I promise it's Dr. Grumpy, and I have your chart in front of me. What's up?"
Mr. Phone: "I'm not comfortable with this. I think I'll just go to ER." (click)
Yeah, I mean you could be a Mongolian yak herder...
ReplyDeleteso now will you get paged by the ER to go see him there?
ReplyDeleteSounds like he needs a psychiatrist more than a neurologist today.
ReplyDeleteBe proactive, call the ER and arrange for a probing by space aliens...
ReplyDeleteI assume ERP will post the next installment of this tale shortly... I guess he felt OK about asking for appointment even though he might have been talking to an impostor. Odd.
ReplyDeleteMe: "Sir, what can I do for you?"
ReplyDeleteMr Conspiracy: "I am having a neurological problem, and my neurologist Ibee Grumpy, has some person based in India answering his pages! And what's worse, the guy claims to be the doctor!"
Me: "Wow, I knew times were tough but I did not know Dr Grumpy was outsourcing himself."
Mr Conspiracy: "Yeah! And would you believe, the guy did Dr Grumpy's accent perfectly!"
Me:"Wow! Are you sure it was not Dr Grumpy himself you were talking to?"
Mr Conspiracy: "I could tell because I smelled incense"
Me: "Over the phone?! Wow, those guys are good! Lets get you a little vitamin A and I'll page Dr Grumpy myself. I'm sure he'd love to come into the ER today to see you. "
Mr Conspiracy: "Please do! I figure you know a secret code word to get past the Indian impersonators."
Please don't even think that, Stephanie. I'm a psychiatrist and I'm on call today. (Especially since the day after Thanksgiving is notoriously one of the busiest days for shrinks.)
ReplyDeleteHow weird.
ReplyDeleteperfect.
ReplyDeleteIMHO,
ReplyDeleteYou should stop asking your male patients 'what's up?' if you want to be taken seriously as a physician ;-)
He was probably scared that you had taught one of your yaks to mimic your voice. I mean, who wants a diagnosis from a yak?
ReplyDeleteI just randomly found this blog today and it has cracked me up. All the talk of Mongolian yaks made me think of this comment an old coworker made...
ReplyDeleteRedneck Coworker: That smells like an Algonquin yak fart.
Me: You moron. Algonquin is a north American Indian tribe and they DID NOT have yaks! You mean MONGOLIAN.
Coworker: *completely serious* That's NOT an Indian tribe!
Me: It's called Google. Look it up.
Heh. I once convinced an American co-worker that a New Zealand sheepskin was the hide of a West Virginian pygmy sasquatch. Why West Virginian? Well, the sheepskin is black, and I explained that it makes good camouflage against the coal...
ReplyDelete