We used to be able to re-stock medical supplies for the ambulance right from the ER. Years ago when we would have a new EMT (Emergency Medical Technician) on the ambulance we'd tell them to go get a fallopian tube from the ER cart. When they could not find one, or had no idea what they were looking for, we told them to ask the nurse for help. It worked just about 50% of the time.
I visited a patient in the hospital who had been given a lot of medicine for her pain. She mentioned she liked my necklace, which is a piece of polished stone of some sort. I thanked her and admitted I don't know what the stone is. "Oh," she said, "I think it's an oxycontin."
Allegedly true story from the early days of Air New Zealand, an airline on which they still hand out hard candies (on some flights, anyway) to help passengers clear their Eustacian tubes during descent: A steward was handing out the barley sugar candies and offered one to a young woman who asked what it was for. The steward responded "If you suck on it as the plane descends, it will clear your Fallopian tubes." A grey-haired male OBGYN in the seat behind her overheard this, and remarked in a thick German accent "Young man, if you can clear Fallopian tubes with barley sugars, you will become a very rich man!".
There's a thinking with your lower brain joke that I just am not clever enough to come up with.. *sigh*
ReplyDelete-Flavius
I hope she never asks to have her Eustachian tubes tied.
ReplyDeleteO.M.G.!!! Self diagnosed for head up ass. Or close to it!
ReplyDeleteWV: shuriagi. Is that some sort of Asian sex thing?
She is no dumber than I am. I have no idea where one is.Tho I don't think it is in my ear.
ReplyDeleteToo much aural sex.
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised that in reference, she didn't mention it was 'all tied up'.
ReplyDeleteI hoped you warned her about the dangers of aural sex.
ReplyDeleteNope, not even going there at all. Stay away and nobody will get hurt.
ReplyDeleteThat's because she had her eustachian tubes tied to prevent pregnancy!
ReplyDeleteHeh. Yes. The fallopian tube. Facepalm.
ReplyDeleteI assume she didn't get this info from the google. At least I hope not.
yeah an hopefully both of your eustachian tubes down there are irreparably plugged up.
ReplyDeleteProbably too much aural sex
ReplyDeleteIf you think that's bad, wait till childbirth.
ReplyDelete...I'm starting a pool to see how many people will make the same aural sex joke....
ReplyDeleteYou know, I've met a woman or two who wore her ovaries on her earlobes...
ReplyDeleteWhat unique anatomy!!!
ReplyDelete(Not going anywhere NEAR aural sex thoughts!!!)
My God! I've had that too! It's awful!
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]
Hey Anonymous, when I posted my aural sex joke there were no other comment up yet.
ReplyDeletethank you mark, and cthulu, and omdg. when the high hanging fastball is served, knock it out of the park. knuckleball grumpy.
ReplyDeleteEasy for you guys to say. I'm the one who has to sit there and keep a straight face when they say things like this.
ReplyDeleteWe used to be able to re-stock medical supplies for the ambulance right from the ER. Years ago when we would have a new EMT (Emergency Medical Technician) on the ambulance we'd tell them to go get a fallopian tube from the ER cart. When they could not find one, or had no idea what they were looking for, we told them to ask the nurse for help. It worked just about 50% of the time.
ReplyDeleteI visited a patient in the hospital who had been given a lot of medicine for her pain. She mentioned she liked my necklace, which is a piece of polished stone of some sort. I thanked her and admitted I don't know what the stone is. "Oh," she said, "I think it's an oxycontin."
ReplyDeletewell i used to know a man who frequently claimed he had been cured of ovarian cancer!
ReplyDelete1316- next time send them for an otis elevator.
ReplyDeleteAllegedly true story from the early days of Air New Zealand, an airline on which they still hand out hard candies (on some flights, anyway) to help passengers clear their Eustacian tubes during descent: A steward was handing out the barley sugar candies and offered one to a young woman who asked what it was for. The steward responded "If you suck on it as the plane descends, it will clear your Fallopian tubes." A grey-haired male OBGYN in the seat behind her overheard this, and remarked in a thick German accent "Young man, if you can clear Fallopian tubes with barley sugars, you will become a very rich man!".
ReplyDeleteIf fallopian tubes were in our ears, Hippocrates would have been a lot closer to right, 2000 years ago.
ReplyDeleteI've always wondered why the pupils dilate...
ReplyDelete