(Lady comes in, signs in, then continues to stand at counter)
Mary: "Hi, Mrs. Patty. We'll get you back in a sec. Do you need something?"
Mrs. Patty: "Um, yeah, do you guys have a hamburger I can have?"
Mary: "Excuse me?"
Mrs. Patty: "Do you have a hamburger? I just dropped my mom off at the airport, and I'm really hungry."
Hey, it was worth a shot.
ReplyDeleteWhere do you find these people? Or, more accurately, how do all these people find you?
ReplyDeleteCome to think of it, if you gave one hambuger to each patient, I bet you could double your practice.It never hurts to try something new.
ReplyDeleteSo did you tell she needed to be NPO?
ReplyDeleteAnd fries, too, please.
ReplyDeletePatient's personal goals for treatment: to eat lunch.
ReplyDeleteSome people... where does she think these hamburgers would be kept? I can understand other kinds of munchies (fruit, bagged snacks, 4X) but still... *shrugs*
ReplyDeleteSo, where's your soft serve ice cream machine?
ReplyDeleteOr, even better... The open bar! Yeah, that's it. Come see Dr. Grumpy and get free booze!
I'd switch doctors for that, snort!
Wow. I like this lady!
ReplyDeleteFrom now on, I'm going to start asking that everywhere I go.
if you do not ask, they cannot say yes.
ReplyDeleteMust be kin to J. Wellington Wimpy.
ReplyDeleteI can see asking for a pen, a phone book, a piece of paper, heck, a piece of hard candy! But a hamburger????? Strange, very strange. What planet do your patients come from?????
ReplyDeleteHow funny. I can just imagine Mary's expression. By now, probably, she just looked up in a friendly tone of voice, and said, 'no', but the doctor will be with you shortly?
ReplyDeletePersonally, I would've asked for a chocolate cookie or a vanilla wafer. What kind of a nurse doesn't keep things handy for starving patients. Surely, there's a stale cookie somewhere, or maybe a bottle of open Tums, liquid Maalox? Something, just something to avoid the grumble, rumble in Dr. Grumpy's office!
And Mary's response?
ReplyDeletebwahahahhahaaaaahahaaa! I love it. Worth a shot. Maybe there's a rep there with food, lol!
ReplyDeleteMary, "I'm so sorry, Dr G JUST shut off the grill in the back. It's open from 11-11:15 on the autumnal and vernal equinoxes. Try back in six months!"
ReplyDeleteWord Verification: Holubble. Dr G's patients holubble into his office with carpal tunnel of the neck.
Post head injury patient by any chance?
ReplyDeleteWhile you're at it, could I get a prescription for a couple chili dogs?
ReplyDeleteWhat do you think this is, a cafeteria?
ReplyDelete*That is what I would say at my job-domestic engineer*
WV congresp-seriously? You need ESP to understand what congress is doing?
Jeeze, you run a pretty ghetto office. What with no short order cook standing by...
ReplyDeleteIt was worth a shot. My MD's office has some drug rep bring in lunch every freaking day! I'm not making this up, it's nauseating.
ReplyDeleteI particularly like the specificity of the request--not just, would you have something I could eat, but a hamburger!
ReplyDeleteAlso the non sequitur or at least missing piece of info--took Mom to airport and I'm really hungry! Did she push her Mom to the airport in a wheelbarrow or is she just trying to say she missed lunch?
Sure sounds like carpal tunnel, no?
I guess I'll have to work on a line of Dr. Grumpy barbecue gear for the Christmas season.
ReplyDeleteDid Mary ask her if she wanted fries with that?
ReplyDeleteDid the patient offer to gladly pay Tuesday for a hamburger today?
Um...No, but I've got a great big bag full of GO AWAY right here in my desk drawer. How about a few servings of that, Huh??
ReplyDelete(Mentally. Of course.)
Well, maybe you could offer her this tasty treat!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.nytimes.com/1997/08/29/us/kentucky-doctors-warn-against-a-regional-dish-squirrels-brains.html
It's a hilarious article, in a creepy neurology kind of way... and yummy goodness!
i will buy grumpy barbecue gear.
ReplyDelete"Did Mary ask her if she wanted fries with that?"
ReplyDeleteBahahaa! That would have been the perfect comeback! :P
Let's just review the train of thought here........
ReplyDelete1. Have dropped mom at airport.
2. Feel hungry.
3. Have to see doctor.
4. Will ask clinic for hamburger.
Sincerely hope that you admitted the patient immediately for further testing, for suspected severe illogical thought processes.
Or perhaps she was on a strict diet and just suffering from *breakthrough* hunger pangs.
I can see it now. Dr. Grumpy's Hamburger Grill and Neurology Center. Beer served after your appointment.
ReplyDeleteNot going to lie, once I was seated in a dentist chair and they asked if they could get me anything while I was waiting. I didn't say it but the only thing that came into my head was, "Some breakfast."
ReplyDelete<>< Katie