Dr. Grumpy: "They told me you had a seizure last night. What do you remember?"
Mrs. Ictal: "I remember that bitch nurse waking me up. She kept asking me if I was okay. Of course I'm not okay. I'm in a fucking hospital, and seizure or not it was the first decent sleep I've had since I got here, and she had to ruin it."
Sure this isn't the same patient that was late to her appointment the other day and bitched out you and your staff over the phone?
ReplyDeleteThough truth be told, if I were in a hospital, I think I might say the same thing.
ReplyDeleteLol. Yes its always super-fun to have to be the one there when patients realize the hospital really isn't a great place to rest. A great place to 1) be frequently poked and prodded in the name of treatment and assessment 2) to be disturbed by the variety of bells, whistles and alarms constantly going off (and the TV of the elderly person four rooms down the hall) 3) to try and sleep on a thin, unfamiliar mattress with a crunchy pillow- Absolutely. A great place to sleep - not so much :(. The irony....
ReplyDeleteSee what happens when you don't stay the extra half hour to see Mrs. Hag? She shows up in the hospital.. :-)
ReplyDeleteI think I like Mrs. Ictal.
ReplyDeleteI think she's got OTHER issues that need to be worked on, too!! LOL!!
ReplyDeleteShoulda let him aspirate.
ReplyDeleteOh, I meant "her"
ReplyDeleteOMG! Smart Mrs. Ictal.
ReplyDeleteHow do you keep a straight face when people say things like that?
While I don't like her attitude, and I definitely don't agree with her insulting the nurse who was obviously concerned about her, I have to say that I cannot fathom how sick people ever get better in the hospital. I had to stay for 2 nights once for IV abx after a dog bit me, and I got woken up every 2 hours all night long -- every 4 hours for my own TPR, and ALSO every 4 hours (2 hours after my own) for my roommate's TPR. By the same nurse -- which kind of confused me. Wouldn't it be more efficient (not to mention better for the patients) to do us both at once? Instead of coming in, turning all the lights on, talking, wheeling the beeping monitor around, and then leaving only to return 2 hours later for the roommate? I was so miserable from sleep deprivation after 2 nights that it honestly frightens me to think about ever being SICK in a hospital. I literally considered trying to find a janitor's closet so that I could sleep on the floor.
ReplyDeleteHey, I think that feisty streak might actually help in many situations. Like the nurses have always said whenever I've had a stint, it's the quiet ones we worry about. I'm not suggesting her name-calling was exactly appropriate, but I can totally relate to the bit of disgust in being awakened when you've finally managed to get to a place of decent sleep. (It's not the fault of the nurses, it's just a messed up institutional system in general.) The 5am vitals always drove me a bit batty! Medrninja above hit it dead on. Fortunately I haven't spent a lot of time in the hospital, but I don't intend on going back for anything other than work-related meetings anytime soon!
ReplyDeletehaving been postop in the hospital with the night shift ordering pizza, partying with boyfriends, and helping each other with required computerized education - loudly - i sympathize
ReplyDeleteI'm feeling for both the bitch nurse and Mrs. Ictal. Hospitals are the WORST places to get a good rest. I'm betting the nurse wasn't so inclined to keep waking her up either but when his/her charts get audited and the manager asks why wasn't the patient assessed every so often, the nurse can't say 'uh Mrs Ictal was sleeping'.
ReplyDeleteAfter my seizures I've had the best sleep of my life.
ReplyDeleteI was in ICU for four days and it was so loud from the staff telling jokes and the beeping monitors 24/7, it was not funny. Can you guys keep it down a bit?
ReplyDeleteSo, it's agreed.
ReplyDeleteThe hospital is not the place to go for a nice rest and a good night's sleep.
I was in for 5 nights for pneumonia, and yeah, every 2 freakin' hours they were waking me up for this or that (seems it was always blood - maybe I was in the vampire ward).
On the other hand, the hospital IS the place to go if you need constant monitoring by trained medical personnel who might possibly need to save your sorry ass.
NEVER get between a woman and a good night's sleep.
ReplyDeleteThe head clipboard nurse at our hospital decided HOURLY rounds (yes, they have to be documented) would be a good idea.
ReplyDeleteAfter multiple patient complaints, this idea was dropped.
After my C-section four years ago (scheduled - no pushing at all, so everything south of my navel was just as it had been before, save for the staples) I got poked in the bum every four hours by some well-meaning nurse checking for non-existent hemorrhoids. At least, I hope that's what she was doing. Every time I got drowsy someone was rolling me over and prodding my cheeks - it was like being in effing jail, seriously. If I'd been more lucid I would have posted a sign: I HAD A C-SECTION. PLEASE LEAVE MY ASS ALONE, YOU FETISHISTS.
ReplyDeleteDo nurses wake patients up if there is something abnormal on the heart monitor? Or do they just do it because they (the nurses) are ignorant? Could someone explain please?
ReplyDeleteI've never been admitted as an inpatient to a hospital. A few outpatients, but not inpatient.
The patient should have been glad a nurse was there. What if no nurse showed up when her morphine ran out? (True story.)
ReplyDeleteIt's all about perspective. And some people have none.
Nurse was trying to wake up the patient to see if she was recovering after her seizure, in this case.
ReplyDelete