Miss Boobshow, when I asked you to take off your jacket so I could check your blood pressure, I didn't expect you to whip it off so quickly.
Likewise, I'd have appreciated it if you'd told me in advance that you weren't wearing a shirt, bra, or anything else under it. I would have tried it through the sleeve if I'd known.
The older gentleman that was passing in the office hallway on his way to Dr. Pissy's exam room, however, was very grateful for your actions. He just had cataract surgery last month, and is glad it went so well.
Nice dragon tattoo.
She should have her head examin...oh wait!
ReplyDelete>:p
LOL! For your sake I hope she was young, otherwise ... well you know.
ReplyDeleteAlicia
Who goes to the doctor WITHOUT a shirt on? Only a jacket!!!????!!!
ReplyDeleteWow, I don't know how you hold you tongue around your patients!
I am guessing where the dragon tattoo is . . .
ReplyDeleteSERIOUSLY? What the hell?
ReplyDeleteYes I'm serious. I have the emotional scars to prove it.
ReplyDeletewhy wasn't the door closed. the fact that the man walking down the hall could see it disturbs me.
ReplyDeleteBecause I was only going to take her BP. Generally that's not very revealing. If she'd warned me in advance she was going to unleash the hounds, I'd have closed it.
ReplyDeleteIs Dr. Pissy new? I don't remember hearing about him before.
ReplyDeleteLet me guess...this lady was an older lady and shall I say fed very well? I don't think you'd be complaining if it was a young one.
ReplyDeleteI'm still trying to get past the part where you took her BP. You didn't order your RN to come in and take it! Way to go Dr. Grumpy!
ReplyDeleteEric- We've shared space for over 10 years, but I've only mentioned him once or twice before.
ReplyDeleteAnon- I've always done all my own BP's.
ReplyDeleteMore about Dr. Pissy, please. If that's his name, you must have good stories.
ReplyDeleteRegarding the jacket with no shirt, OR bra, underneath, I'm speechless.
Dr. Grumpy...
ReplyDelete"unleash the hounds..."
That is quite the mental picture.
*shudder*
>:p
Verification word: angst (HA!)
A few years ago I went to my regular GP for an annual (read: gyno) exam. I'm 37, so I have some sense of how these things are supposed to go. I was in a gown, on the table, feet in stirrups, speculum in place, with my Trusted Doctor's lubed fingers feeling around exactly where they were supposed to be, just prior to the Pap smear culture being taken. Except the nurse never brought in the tray with the swab, slide, etc. Realizing her mistake, SHE OPENED THE DOOR TO GO GET ONE, putting everything God gave me on display to all and sundry walking by in the hall. It's the only time I've ever heard Trusted Doctor yell. If she's interested, I'm ready to trade places with Ms. Boobshow. Except . . . I don't have any cool tattoos.
ReplyDeleteUm... yeah - wasn't thinking quite rightly the morning I got dressed for my appointment with the physiatrist to unlock my sacroiliac joint. All he managed to say after "bend down and touch your toes" was "my... um... you're certainly... flexible"
ReplyDeleteNote to self: no Victoria Secret black thong undies to doctor appointments.
Urg.
A friend of mine once applied tape to a particularly low cut dress so that her "puppy noses" didn't accidently show ;)
ReplyDeleteHey, Anon 1:45!
ReplyDeleteI was getting prepped for surgery with the door to the hall wide open. When I complained the response was that only hospital employees were walking up and down that particular hall and not to worry about it. That's not the first time I've had modesty tsk tsked! I swear the next time I'm going to respond that prostitutes are also professionals used to seeing old wrinkled hineys, but I have no intention of flashing them either.
--M
I can't help but think of a line from a poem by Robert Graves: "How naked go the sometime nude!" <--the poem is a fantastic contemplation on the difference between the naked and the nude. Clearly this particular patient doesn't appreciate the subtle difference.
ReplyDeleteIn her defense, though, I must say that if one has been a patient long enough--such that one has been seen naked by health professionals on myriad occasion--it may be that she just doesn't give a rat's ass anymore. At a certain point, a body is just a body, after all. Add a little dementia to the mix and, well, she'll probably appear at her next visit in her birthday suit. <--but at least then you'll be prepared, Dr. G! ;-)
Speaking of weird clothing occurrences at the doctor's office, does anyone know why my PCP seemed disturbed when I wore button-fly Lucky jeans to an appointment? Is there something strange about a woman wearing pants that button? If anyone can enlighten me, I'd appreciate it. :-)
I forgot what I was going to say now. I'm just picturing you just casually going about taking that BP.
ReplyDeleteAhem, anon 1:45, I hate to say anything to cause distrust, and I know the point of your comment was about the nurse's mistake in opening the door, but I just gotta say, your Trusted Doctor's lubed fingers should not have been where you implied they were if the pap smear specimen had not yet been collected. I'm just saying...
ReplyDeleteEeeep!
ReplyDeleteas a pharmacy intern, I've seen my fair share of boobage just from little old ladies coming in to get their flu shots. you'd think after twenty years of flu shots they'd know to wear the short-sleeved shirts....
ReplyDeletethey don't.
I think they purposefully try to wear the button-ups that have no arm give so that the whole effing shirt has to come off.
I sympathize with your being scarred.
Oh dear...
ReplyDeleteThis is Anon 1:45 - thanks for the concern. As I recall Trusted Doc was maybe putting the speculum in or palpating an ovary or something. He did not seem at all delighted to be doing the exam (not grossed out, just not overeager) and has never ever been anything other than totally professional so I'm pretty sure nothing untoward was going on. Maybe the general disorganization of the appointment threw off his game? In any case, it taught me something very important: Shave those legs! Someone might be walking by!
ReplyDeletestudent dr. blaze!!!
ReplyDeleteRegarding the lucky jeans...those jeans say "Lucky U" where the fly is. If the doc unbuttoned it, LMAO
Student Dr. Blazer,
ReplyDeleteHere's a sample picture of the fly for your Lucky Jeans.
http://www.zappos.com/boutiques/783/LuckyBrand_main120408.jpg
Why do I know this? The same darn thing happened to me, but only the doctor didn't care but I turned lobster red after realizing.
Hi Moppie,
ReplyDeleteYeah, I realized what the fly said after the appointment...which, of course, just made the whole thing worse. The jeans were hand-me-downs from a friend, so I hadn't realized this subtle detail beforehand.
The thing is, though, he made the comment *before* I unbuttoned my jeans. So either he's really familiar with the look of the buttons on Lucky's or there's something I don't know about button-fly jeans. What can I say? I was post-op and it was the only pair of pants that fit. <--I did say that to him, to which he replied, "why didn't you just wear sweatpants or something?" Uhh.... More disturbing to a waiting room full of people: lady in button-fly jeans or lady in her PJ's? Hmm.... Either way, the whole thing left me wondering if I'd missed some cultural event regarding button-flys & women. Do they appear in Playboy regularly or something?
Just curious! :-) (& glad I'm not the only one with such problems!)
I can empathize with Anon 1:45. At one of my annual exams, I was gazing at the sky through the clear skylights above the stirrups when a roofing guy appeared. Due to sight lines, he probably didn't see much, but I tensed up enough to make my doc say, "Whoa!"
ReplyDeleteI could have broken her fingers.
I gots ta get into neurology ...
ReplyDeleteeither that or just ask women to take off their jacket more often ...