What The List Says

I guess the list is hard to read on cafepress, so here is what it says:


THINGS I LEARNED FROM DR. GRUMPY

1. Never let your daughter put hair clips on a dog.

2. If you change your script from ‘Midrin’ to ‘Morphine’, spell it right.

3. There’s no such thing as “a little brain dead”.

4. Hitting your head repeatedly on a police car windshield does not impress girls.

5. Never disimpact yourself with a toothbrush.

6. Don’t go for coffee while your spouse is having a stroke.

7. Never bring a scale on a cruise ship.

8. Your health insurance company DOES NOT have your best interests at heart.

9. Never volunteer to do the back-to-school shopping.

10. The Wii Fit trainer is a jerk.

11 Diet Coke is a food group.

12. Never call your neurologist at night unless your brain fell out.

13. Your GPS system isn’t perfect.

14. Your neurologist is NOT the information booth.